[Report This]Date: 05-15-09 - 04:32 am Title: 2nd Chances
Getting better and better each time I read!
Author's Response: Thanks for following ;o)
[Report This]Date: 05-15-09 - 02:49 am Title: 2nd Chances
I totally dug it. You are moving at a nice steady pace with the storytelling. I'm a total hooker, I wanted him to take her right there in the car. thankfully you are doing a much better part writing the story and building the anticipation and showing their inner struggle with the situation.
Author's Response: lol...mad funny. Yeah I wanted him to take her too, but I dont know...didnt feel like the right time...if ever...I never know how these things will end up. Thanks for reading.
[Report This]Date: 05-13-09 - 09:16 pm Title: Where Was That Line We Crossed
There were a couple of typos (like "red" instead of "read) but this was really, really good. The whole age factor between them frustrates me, since "technically" she's still a teenager, but this is still pretty entertaining.
Author's Response: Thanks. I've gone through and made some changes. Sorry about my terrible editing skills. I just get so excited about finishing a chapter that I want to post it right away...again I'll try to get a hold on that. I’m having some difficulties of my own with the whole "teenager" thing. I mean considering that its fantasy I actually don’t have a "big" problem with whatever is budding between them (because legally she is an adult), and the fact that I love them together as a couple has a lot to do with it as well....but what gets me the most is the Teacher/student relationship...something like that doesn’t just hurt the people involved.
[Report This]Date: 05-13-09 - 05:07 pm Title: Where Was That Line We Crossed
Good chapter, update soon. ;)
[Report This]Date: 05-13-09 - 12:25 am Title: Where Was That Line We Crossed
You are writing this story beautifully. It is not an easy subject to write about and you are showing their confusion and how uncomfortable they are with the mutual attraction.
I hope you post more and more. You are tackling an issue that seems to occur alot lately but these characters have special circumstances AND they are both of legal age, which makes it very cool and still forbidden.
Keep the story going sister. I loveit.
Author's Response: Thanks a lot for the support. The last thing that I want is for this to turn into something crass. Im still waiting to see what direction it goes in...Catch you next chapter!
[Report This]Date: 05-12-09 - 11:38 pm Title: Where Was That Line We Crossed
Again another nice chapter. A few spelling mistakes here and there, but nothing too major. Although, I have to ask, was the Professor Summers you were referring to earlier in the chapter the same Scott Summers that was trying to date Ororo earlier in the story or another Summers? That one threw me for a loop.
I have to say, I'm interesting in what news did Ororo have. I'm guessing he decided to back out of any sort of relationship, but I wonder why? Was the prospect of her leaving for another college too much for him to even warrant an effort?
Oh well we'll see.
Author's Response: Yeah my bad, I've been reviewing some of my other fan fics and Im getting my story all mixed up...thanks for keeping me on my toes I've changed it. The spelling errors? I tried really hard this time ran spell check like 5 times,and read it over about as much...editing isnt one of my strongest areas as you can see...oh well. Like I said if you can point me in the direction of a good beta reader that would be great...if not then Im sure my spelling isnt going to get any better. Thanks for reading.
[Report This]Date: 05-11-09 - 09:50 pm Title: Normal?
This was good. Poor Logan. Tempted professor+nightie+hot student = Big Trouble.
[Report This]Date: 05-10-09 - 08:01 pm Title: Normal?
It's a good beginning ! I'm eager to read the rest !
[Report This]Date: 05-10-09 - 06:59 pm Title: Normal?
I'm gonna start out by saying, I like your story. You have a few grammatical errors. You start a new paragraph when a different person starts to speak. A few spelling mistakes, all in all there's nothing too bad that a good beta couldn't find.
Even dialogue is not bad. My only real issue is moral really. The whole teacher/student relationship thing, is always very touchy. Usually with stories such as these, the Author makes light of such issues because they want to get straight to the romance.
I always think that's a mistake, because it shows how strong of a character they both are if they actually fight and grieve with themselves over their feelings. Oppose to the two of them just jumping in the bed at first chance.
It makes your story seem more real not to mention it gives it more substance and depth. I mean really explore the notion. Make it more than just, Logan's on the rebound from his fight with Jean. And Ororo just sees Logan as someone a lot more mature than the other boys her age.
Anyway that's just my thoughts. See ya next chapter!
Author's Response: Wow, thanks for the input. You brought up some good points...when I think about this story and the direction it's going...I do want it to be about more then sex. Although the sexual tension cant be out right ignored...Your review reminded me of the importance of taking things slow. I knew going into it that the age difference and the stigma of Teacher/Student relationships was a sensitive situation, and might not sit well with some folks. I only hope to be respectful, but yet realistic as I go along...The grammatical errors? I'll try to be more mindful of those...if you know of any good beta readers let me know. Thanks again.
[Report This]Date: 05-10-09 - 05:44 am Title: Normal?
Loving the beginning can't wait for the next chapter!
[Report This]Date: 05-10-09 - 03:03 am Title: Schools Out Forever
Pretty good start.
[Report This]Date: 05-09-09 - 09:56 pm Title: Normal?
YUM!! this is a delicious story. MORE! MORE! MORE! :)
[Report This]Date: 05-09-09 - 05:45 pm Title: Normal?
Wow. This sounds very promising! I look forward to your next update!!
[Report This]Date: 05-09-09 - 05:21 pm Title: Normal?
wow you must continue; please?
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