If the Money’s Good

Thirty thousand.

That’s what the bounty was on this one.

Some lowlife who torched a civilian complex.

Logan took one last drag of his cigar and crushed it beneath his reinforced combat boot.

The place was nice, considering the district it was in. Dealers and pushers were on most of the corners here. Pimps were trying to push their newest pleasure droids at the doors of every sleazy strip club in the area.

The Black.

The name of the club just didn’t fit. It stood out with its grand lights and well-crafted doors. A haven for scumbags and criminals, Logan wished he would have checked the charts for other possible marks; he could have made a killing.

Wouldn’t expect a punk like the one he was after to be in a place like this; his style ran more for the dives at the far end of the sector.

Logan pulled his coat tightly around him and made his way for the door. The doorman stopped him before he could walk in. He was a cyborg by the look of it, and a piss-poorly assembled one at that.

“Private night tonight, chap” he said in a monotone. Logan could hear the gears in his body whirl as he raised his arm to block his entry.

Logan didn’t need trouble yet, best to let this one roll quietly for the time being.

“Got business.”

“With who?”

“Ya don’t expect me to go slinging names now, do ya?” Logan gave a half smile.

The doorman rolled his shoulders. “You don’t say it, you don’t get in.”

“You want to be the one to tell one of these guys that you turned away an important business partner?”

The cyborg stiffened. The bosses didn’t like to lose business, and if the runt did indeed have an appointment, he could get into a lot of trouble by turning him away. “Your weapons.”

Logan grinned on the inside; these guys should really invest in cerebral implants. He pulled his sidearm out and handed it to the doorman.

“You expect me to believe you only have one,” he asked, eyebrows quirked.

Logan snorted and pulled out another blaster from his hidden shoulder holster, along with the one hidden in a secret compartment on his boot. He looked at the doorman, smiling.

The cyborg sighed and ran a scanner down Logan’s body. He narrowed his eyes at the readings. “You cyborg?”

“Something like that.”

The doorman looked at him closely. “They did good work,” he stopped a moment, adding “You’re not a infiltration unit, are you?”

Logan sighed “Would I carry so many goddamned blasters if I was?”

The doorman cracked a small smile and opened the door. “Ya can pick these up at the front, welcome to the Black, sir.”

Logan shouldered past him and went in.

The place was full of people, some at the bar, others at the booths in the middle of the floor, and a lot in the dark corners in the back.

Logan picked out at least half a dozen marks with respectable bounties as soon as he sat down.

Teach me to check the charts.

He ordered a beer from the human bartender and leaned back against the bar, taking in his surroundings. There were two marks in here that tallied at almost a hundred thousand; he grimaced at the loss as he took a sip of his beer.

“Fuck,” he grunted, putting the bottle back on the bartop “Thought a place like this would have the real thing, not this syntho crap!”

The bartender shrugged. “Real deal costs money pal, and from the look of it, you couldn’t afford it.”

Logan sneered and took another sip of the rancid piss they were passing as brew. The lights of the place flashed in tune to the music they were playing. Dance platforms were at every booth, with several dancers in each.

He reached down and pressed a small button on the forearm scanner he wore. The device flickered on and began feeding information into the contact in Logan’s right eye. He moved his head at a slow pace, scanning each individual. The info that came up listed just about everyone in the place with some kind of criminal record, a prostitute here, gun runner there, even a few lieutenants for various Crim syns.

No trace of my boy yet.

Logan kept the scan up. He also saw a few Black Runs, illegal bounties. He ignored those when he could; they always got messy.

The scan stopped on the far side booth toward the back.

Bingo.

The scan brought up just what he wanted to see.
Subject: St. John Allerdyce
Species: Mutant Human
Height: 5.9
Weight: 9 stone
Mutation: Pyrokinesis
Affiliation: Black Dawn, Reaver, various Crime Syns
Status: Wanted
Crime: Arson, murder, extortion
Guild Edict: Assigned
Reward: Alive, Thirty thousand platinum
Dead, Zero

Logan sipped at his beer. The target was found, now came the wait.

Allerdyce sat in the booth, drinking heavily and laughing, a woman on each arm. They ducked their heads to the table snorting white angel in long lines, and then draining a large gulp from the ale bottle.

Logan remained fixed on him; at the rate Allerdyce was drinking, it wouldn’t be long now. An hour passed and finally Logan’s chance arose. Rising from the booth, Allerdyce walked to the side door in the back.

Logan stood from his stool and threw a plat on the bar for the beer and followed.

Logan swore when he entered the bathroom; it was nicer than some of the places he had lived in, larger most definitely.

Shaking his head, he went and stood at a fresher, right beside Allerdyce.

Logan undid the straps of his pants and did his business; despite it all he did have to go.

Allerdyce had a big relaxed grin on his face as he finished. He zipped up and made to leave. Logan did the same.

Before reaching the door, Logan grabbed Allerdyce by the back of his head and rammed it against the wall. He went down in a heap.

“What the fuck, man!” he screamed, covering his bleeding nose.

Logan stood over him. “St. John Allerdyce, you are wanted for one count of arson and four counts of murder. By the edict of the Hunter’s Guild, I place you under arrest.”

Logan slapped a small pin on the side of his neck and clicked it on. “That’s a suppression chip. Try to remove it and it goes ‘boom’.”

St. John looked up at him as if he were crazy. “Do you know who I am?”

Logan landed a hard punch against the side of his head, knocking him out cold.

He walked over to the sink and rinsed his hands. “Somebody who doesn’t wash his fucking hands.”

Slinging the unconscious man over his shoulder, Logan walked out. He drew stares and he heard questions being asked, but no one made a move toward him. He approached the front desk and the girl behind it gave him a strange look.

“My guns,” he said lightly as he provided his thumb print to match that of the handles.

She still had that look on her face when she brought him his weapons.

Logan slapped Allerdyce on the ass once and smiled. “My boy toy for the night.”

She grimaced and let him sign his guns out.

Walking out of the club, the doorman shook his head “You caused some shit, didn’t you?’

Logan grinned at him, “Not really, poor boy had one too many, is all.”

He didn’t look convinced. “I think you should set him down.”

Logan sighed, it had been goin’ so good so far. “Can’t do that, bub, this guy right here has it coming, and he sure ain’t worth the trouble.”

The sound of a blaster charging rung in his ears. “Maybe, but the boss don’t like people coming into his place and packing paying customers out on their shoulders; it’s bad for business.”

Logan turned slowly and saw the barrel of a blaster pointed at his chest. “So is pulling guns on people.”

“Drop what you’re carrying, or I’m going to be forced to burn a hole through you.”

A normal person would not be able to beat a cyborg in speed and reflexes.

Logan grinned. Good thing he wasn’t one of those.

Snikt…

The blaster fell to the ground in two pieces, the same as the doorman’s cybernetic arm.

Logan planted his claws on either side of the cyborg’s throat, still merely flesh. “That’s it, bub, don’t make me take away what little meat ya still got.”

The doorman grimaced. “I have pain sensors, asshole, that hurt!”

“Just think how bad the rest will feel if I decided to start working ya.” Logan pointed a claw near near the doorman’s eye. “We have an understanding, right?”

Allerdyce moaned and moved a bit. Logan made a face and swung his body a bit, hitting the semi-conscious perp’s head against the wall and rendering him cold again.

“Right?” he asked again, claws still trained on the cyborg.

Slowly, the doorman shook his head yes.

Logan retracted them and walked away.

Down the street in an abandoned lot, Logan touched a button on his forearm control and the stealth switched off on his pride and joy, The Canuck, an older model Stryker Scout ship. Logan had bought it after the War, and rebuilt it from the ground up.

“Daddy’s home, baby.”

The hatch opened and he entered. He placed Allerdyce in one of the holding cells and made ready to depart. He lit a cigar and smiled. Thirty thousand more to a nicely growing pile.

The ship rose from the ground and was off the planet in moments.

Logan reclined in the pilot seat. The autopilot was set; now, just some peace and quiet…

“Logan!”

Too much to hope for.

Logan rotated the chair to come face to face with a holographic image of young woman with green eyes and dark, rich hair with a broad white highlight. “Anna, love it when you drop by unannounced.”

She smirked at Logan. “Yeah, yeah; did ya get yer mark?”

Logan gestured to the back of his ship. “One more sleazy perp ready to be bagged and tagged, thanks to yours truly.”

Anna nodded her head. “Okay, then, that’s a solid thirty grand for you, minus my ten percent representation fee, not a bad score.”

Logan inhaled deeply “Yeah, not too bad. Missed a lot of plats on this one, though. Ya know I saw Wilson fucking Fisk back on that shit hole, do ya know what kind of bounty that guy has on him?”

She shrugged. “If you would check the charts…”

Logan waved it away. “That’s what I have you for, ain’t it?”

“I am your legal rep for the Guild, not your secretary,” she reminded him, with a bit of aggravation.

“Well, get me one, preferably a redhead.”

Anna laughed and started smacking her lips as if she were chewing gum. “Oh, I’m on that now as we speak, Mr. H.” She made her voice high and squeaky-sounding. “Can I get you some coffee, too?”

“Rather have a real beer.”

“Keep up with the pace you’ve been on, and you’ll be able to buy a whole brewery.”

Logan grinned from ear to ear at the thought of that.

“Are you coming back to the Den soon?” she asked, casting a glance over her shoulder. “These Federal guys are getting on my nerves.”

Logan sighed, “Yeah, I’ll be there in a few hours, tell that tight-ass Summers to have his men and my money ready.”

He sat up in the chair and pointed a finger at her, “Don’t let that prick give ya any guff, either. We did his ass a favor by going to that gutter of a planet, I hate Diltora.”

Anna nodded. “I know, I know, I heard the whole thing from Summers. Diltora is outside of Federal territory, that’s why they sought guild help, I still think we should have raised the bounty some for tracking the bastard down for them.”

Logan snickered. “Don’t worry your pretty little head about it, Darlin’, I’ll take care of the finer points when I get back. Have Wade meet me in the hangar, we got to do some work on my baby, and get me some jobs lined up.”

Anna rolled her eyes. “Jeez, don’t you ever take a break?”

“Not when there’s money to be made,” he replied.

“The great Wolverine never stops, does he?”

“Nope.”

Anna sighed; oh, well, more money in her pocket. “I’ll have you something lined up when you get here.”

“Make it the Toynbee Hunt, that little bastard has forty-five thousand on his head; I had my bid in for it a week ago.”

Anna nodded and began going through the guild charts. She came back with that look on her face.

Logan really hated that look.

“What?” he groused.

Anna attempted a weak smile. “Um… the Toynbee file has been closed.”

Logan didn’t quite hear that right. “Say that again.”

“It’s closed. He was brought in two days ago.” Anna braced herself for what was coming.

“SHIIIIIIIIIITTTTT!!”

Anna winced, and started rubbing her ringing ears.

“Who the hell did that, I had a week bid on that contract, and I sure as hell know they didn’t think I was up to the job!” Logan was up out of the chair pacing around. “Was it a certified mark?”

Anna checked. “Yep, it was one of the Guilds, legal and all.”

Logan stopped pacing for a second and thought. There wasn’t anyone he knew that could outbid him on a contract, especially not since he had put in for it a week ago. It would take someone with either a better record than him or…

It dawned on him.

“Who brought Toynbee in?”

Anna hung her head low, at this moment she would rather have been in any other person’s shoes in the universe than her own.

“She did it again, didn’t she?”

Anna did not move, did not speak, did not even breathe…

“Just tell me, Darlin’, is it who I’m thinking it is?” Logan’s teeth were grinding so hard, it was a wonder sparks weren’t flying.

Anna looked up at him with a shy smile and quickly nodded.

“GODDAMMIT, STORM!!!!!!”

Another day at the office

Logan was in a bad mood.

That was nothing new, but at the moment, he was in a REALLY bad mood.

He stomped throughout the interior of his ship, cursing and swearing, for the entire two-hour trip.

I am going to kill her.

That was his constant.

First, I’m going to shoot her; THEN I’m going to kill her.

Logan finally plopped back down into the pilot seat, still huffing in anger.

Shoot her, cut her heart out, and THEN kill her.

The Den came up on the viewing screen, as thoughts of the mayhem he was going to inflict still jumped up and down in his mind.

The Den was the unofficial name of the Guild House of Hunters. A large station, hidden deep in an asteroid field, and disguised as such. Large ships had no way of entry, only smaller cruisers and personal shuttles. The guild conducted all of their business here; it acted as refueling station, temporary prison, supply and munitions vendor, communication center, and embassy for every Hunter in the galaxy.

“Code identification, please.”

The voice on the com brought Logan out of a lovely dream he was having about what a plasma saw could do to the human body.

“XX493581. Wolverine.”

Logan waited as patiently as he possibly could. He lit a cigar and puffed harshly on it, waiting for the little red light on the control board to turn green, letting him know the scan was finished.

He stared at the little red light as if it had just given him the finger.

Right before he was about to say to hell with it, and blast the little red bastard to hell…

“You may proceed, Hunter Wolverine.”

Logan punched the controls and put the ship on a landing course.

As soon as they knew Logan was docking, Anna and Wade walked briskly to the hangar.

Even under his face mask, Anna could see Wade was nervous. Who was she trying to fool, she was nervous, too. Logan would never hurt them, well, at least not her, anyway; sometimes Wade riled Logan up a bit too much, but being around him when he was like this was never a fun experience.

“Wanna make some bets?” Wade asked, in his always unnerving, upbeat tone, “I could make some damn profitable wagers that we see at least a severed arm at exactly five minutes after he steps off the ship.”

Anna rolled her eyes at him. “Wade, please don’t start!”

“Cone on, we’ve got to make some money while we can,” he urged in a whiny tone. “I mean, we’re going to be losing our biggest hitter and,” he made quotation marks with his fingers, “the ‘Rogue Cell’ will be out of business.”

He shook his head. “I still say we should have named our division ‘Deadpool Pest Removal, We kill em so you don’t have to;’ see, that has a good, market-friendly tone to it.”

“Will you shut up?”

“What I’m saying is though, if he gets put away by the guild for killing another hunter, and even if by some miracle, we do get to keep our licenses, that means I’m going to have to do double time on my hunts, and do you know how badly that cuts into my Golden Girls reruns?’ Wade paused a moment, “Guess I could always sell my body to science as a part-time gig.”

“They don’t buy from the dollar bin, sugah,” Anna said, quirking a smile.

Wade gasped, “You wound me, you heartless wench, my ego will be forever torn asunder, I don’t think… ooooo, gummi snacks!” He had stopped at an old, rundown vending machine they walked past.

“Wade!”

Looking longingly at the snacks, Wade sighed and followed close in tow.

Hangar:

Logan had exited the ship, checked the charge on his blaster and was about to go and commit murder with a smile, when Anna and Wade showed up in the hangar.

“Hey, the Wolverine’s in the house, yeah! “Wade rushed over to him, holding his hand high in the air. “Thirty thousand plats, man! Yeah, give me some skin, dog!”

Logan seared holes into Wade’s face. “Not. In. The. Mood. Wilson.”

Wade knew that tone. “Do you want a hug or something, ‘cause you know I’m here for you?” He opened his arms and grinned brightly under his mask.

Logan growled menacingly at him, and Wade, for once, took the hint.

“Okay. I got it, you’re angry right now, so I’m going to stand over here all the while projecting my love to you and hopefully you can enhance your calm…”

Logan raised his blaster at Wade, the vein on the side of his head throbbing.

Anna stepped in front of him and the gun. “Come on Logan, there is no need to be so upset, so she took a job you wanted; it’s not like the universe ain’t full of scum bags.”

Logan lowered the pistol when he realized he couldn’t get a good shot at Wilson. “That ain’t the point Anna, this is the third time she has done this, and it’s cost us almost half a million in plats! I don’t care if she THINKS she is as good as I am, but she is NOT gonna keep stealing our marks.”

“According to her records, she has filled contracts on almost as many perps as you have, so by Guild SOP, if Hunters are of equal renown and standing, then bids are open to any who can take them, and it just so happens the only Hunter in the whole galaxy who’s even remotely close to your Standing is..”

“Don’t say it,” Logan warned, holding a finger up, “I don’t want to hear it anymore, I’m gonna go kill her and be done with it.”

“Logan, when you kill her, you’ll be brought up on charges before the Guild, have ALL of our licenses revoked, you’ll be thrown in prison, and Wade and I will be technically fucked.”

“I’ll make it look like an accident,” he said, trying for one last ditch attempt to take his frustrations out his way.

Anna arched a brow at him. “How, cutting her head off and saying she slipped in the Fresher?”

“It could happen,” Wade piped up, but he went back to being quiet when he got the look from Anna.

“Let me take the legal way with this,” she continued. “I’ll bring it before the Guild Counsel, and do what I can. Who knows, maybe they’ll force her to give us some form of compensation, you know they say the Pen is mightier than the Sword.”

“Yeah, if you stab somebody in the eye with it,” Logan mumbled, but nodded his head in agreement. “After I’m done with Summers, though, I AM giving that bitch a piece of my mind.”

“So long as that piece does not have anything to do with blasters claws, explosives, knives, clubs or poisons, go right ahead.”

“You forgot toothbrushes,” Wade chimed in again.

Anna and Logan fixed him with exasperated stares.

He looked from each of their faces in quick succession. “Hey, it’s possible, I put one through a guy’s head once.”

The look on Logan and Anna’s face remained frozen.

Wade pointed at Anna and shook his finger. “Hey, I’m just trying to help you out.”

“Get started on the ship, then, Wade,” Anna sighed. Rubbing at her temple, she looked at Logan. “And you better let Summers know you’re here, I’m surprised he hasn’t already burst in here complaining about schedules.”

The door in the rear hangar opened, and an armed escort of Federal soldiers entered, followed by a tall man wearing the uniform of Federal Captain.

“Spoke to soon, Darlin’,” Logan said, putting on his best smile as the soldiers stopped in front of him.

“Late as usual, Howlett,” Captain Scott Summers informed him. “I see you don’t maintain any of the punctuality of a soldier.”

“Never had any,” Logan said, lighting the remains of his cigar. “’Sides, One-Eye, I have been here a good twenty minutes, so I guess you could say you’re the one who’s late.”

The visor Scott wore hid the anger brimming in his eyes. “The Federation has hired you to apprehend a fugitive and deliver him…”

“He’s right inside my ship, first holding cage down on the left.” Logan interrupted, “So my part is done, and me and my associates would like our compensation.”

Scott fixed him with a hard stare. He hated dealing with Bounty Hunters, and he hated the fact the Federation let them operate so freely.

Reluctantly, he motioned one of his men forward with a small case. “Thirty thousand, when I see that prisoner alive.”

“Well, if ya keep standin’ here, shootin’ the shit with me, Slim, he’s probably gonna die of old age.” Logan let his smile just shine as brightly as he could. He loved giving any Federation official hell, and Scott Summers had become a favorite of his.

Scott sighed and gave the order for his men to fetch the prisoner.

“Hey, be sure to not to take off that suppression chip on his neck, until ya get somebody to deactivate it, otherwise y’all are gonna be a foot shorter,” Logan said to the guards as they passed him.

“You know, I could reprimand you for those, civilians are not supposed to be in possession of suppressor chips,” Scott said, looking a bit smug.

“Ah, hell, Cap, why write me up for that? I mean, if ya spend an hour or so looking through my ship, I’m positive ya could find something better to waste time and paper on.”

Scott shook his head and turned his attention to the individual who his men were dragging out.

“You didn’t cuff the prisoner?” he asked.

Logan shrugged. “Ya knock ‘em cold and ya don’t have to.”

Allerdyce was woozy but still glared daggers at Logan. “You’re a dead man, Hunter; I know people, you’re a fucking dead man!”

Logan rolled his eyes and gestured with his hand, “Yeah, yeah, yeah, I’m gonna wake up with a horse head in my bed, sleep with the fishes, wish I was never born, and beg for them to kill me, heard it all before, kid. Enjoy lockdown; watch them gorillas.”

Logan smiled and Allerdyce struggled to get to him as the guards dragged him away.

Logan extended his hand to Summers.

Scott looked at him with a raised eyebrow.

Logan looked down at his hand and then back at Summers. “Oh, I sure as hell don’t want a handshake from ya, Summers, just that there case with my pay.”

Scott grinned a bit, and took the case from the soldier by him and handed it off to Logan. “Don’t spend it all in one place.”

“If that place has beer, yer damn right I will.” Logan handed the money to Wade, who cracked the seal, looked inside, and then nodded.

“Always a pleasure for you, Summers” Logan nodded and walked away, Anna and Wade close behind.

“Smooth as ever, sugah,” Anna said. “You know, a little more tact with the Feds would make things run a lot smoother for us.”

“Don’t deny me one of my few pleasures, Darlin’,” Logan replied; as angry as he was when he arrived, the chance to rib “Captain” Summers, did manage to cheer him up a bit. “Now if y’all will excuse me, I have something to get off of my chest.”

“Remember, Logan, NO roughhousing,” Anna reminded him as he walked to the lift. “Just say your piece and be done with it.”

Logan looked hurt as he stepped into the lift. “Darlin, this is me, I can be subtle.”

“As a thermo frag,” Wade whispered to himself.

“Shut up, Wilson.” Damned enhanced hearing…

Logan waved at them. “Back in an hour,” and the lift door closed.

Wade looked at Anna. “Bet?”

“Shut up, Wade.”

The Wreck Room:

Logan stepped out of the lift and smelled the air.

Oh, yeah; she’s here.

Normally Logan would have gone straight to the bar for a glass of rotgut, then a few games of pool; today, though he had to forgo his usual routine.

The blaster at his side was still tempting, even after the warning Anna gave him. Logan knew it was ridiculous, but he swore he could almost hear it talking to him.

Come on, use me, ya know ya want to…

Shut up.

Just a little squeeze, and then ya’ll feel worlds better and have a glass of whiskey and all will be right in the universe once again.

Aint as simple as that.

Sure it is. Ya point me, ya pull the trigger, and boom, happy days are here again.

Yeah, and I get to celebrate in the slammer.

A moment of hesitation. Almost worth it though, huh?

Logan ran a hand down his face. He was talking to his gun. Jesus, the bitch had him so riled up still, he was talking to his gun.

Ignoring the nagging voice of his blaster, Logan continued on through the wreck room.

The crowds were sparse, a few other hunters sat at the bar drinking, others were playing pool and poker at tables. He let his eyes roam across the length of the room, until they settled on a table in the far corner. At it sat the object of his frustrations.

Long, black leather-clad legs, with stiletto heels, were resting comfortably on the table top; she was sitting back in a chair talking to a older man with a thin mustache seated on her left. Her long hair let down for the time being, it was a stark contrast to her brown skin and the black body armor she wore.

Logan narrowed his eyes, pulled his trench coat tightly around his own grey-colored armor and stomped over to her table.

She was laughing about something as he approached, and he sneered at it, his hand going down to his blaster in a moment of weakness. Logan steeled his resolve and let his hand relax.

No shooting. No shooting. No shooting.

He mumbled it as he stopped in front of her table, with a scowl on his face.

She looked up at him and smiled. “Look Forge, who has decided to joins us, the ‘Best Hunter in the Guild,’ the great…….Badger? No, wait, that’s not it…” she crushed her snow-white brows together, thinking.

Logan had a sarcastic smile hanging on his face.

“Mongoose, right?” she said finally, smiling broadly, letting her teeth shine.

“Oh, that’s good,” Logan said, still with the obviously fake smile. “Mongoose, yeah; rodents, I get it.”

Storm kicked a chair out for him. “Seat? Drink?”

Logan shook his head, “No thanks; just came here to say something.”

“Oh,” Storm said, leaning over the table a bit, “I am all ears when you speak.”

Logan had to advert his eyes for a moment, when he found himself absently looking down at the cleavage that showed through her armor. “You’re a bitch.”

She laughed, “Oh, I love when you cut through the foreplay and get right to it, Wolvie.”

Logan slammed his hands down on the table. “You stole my mark.”

Storm leaned forward, their noses touching at the very tip. “I didn’t steal a damned thing from you, I followed S.O.P to the letter, I was completely within my right to do what I did.”

She leaned back and took a drink. “I mean, do you hear other Hunters, whining about when their bids get challenged and their marks taken?”

Logan growled, “Other Hunters don’t have my reputation, there’s a little thing called professional courtesy.”

She laughed again. ‘Professional courtesy? Honey, in case you hadn’t noticed, ours is not the typical run-of-the-mill job, it’s a cutthroat business, every one for themselves.”

“Plus,” Forge quipped, “I had full authorization from the...”

He shut up immediately when Logan pulled his blaster and stuck it right in his face.

Logan held the blaster at arm’s length but never took his eyes off of Storm. “Old man, when I give a shit about what you have to say, I’ll let you know. Until then, shut the fuck up!”

Storm didn’t even blink when he pulled the weapon. He was fast, she thought as she powered up one of her own blasters underneath the table. “You know, I do love when you get all ballistic, Wolvie, but I would suggest you lower your sidearm before I take away your only saving grace.”

Logan looked puzzled a moment, Ororo smiled a bit and motioned him to look down with her eyes.

Slowly he glanced down and saw the red dot of an aiming sight on his crotch.

Son of a bitch…

Carefully Logan lowered his arm and the blaster from Forge’s face. “You always did go for my nuts first.”

Storm smiled and stood up, keeping the blaster fixed on its target. She slowly walked over to him, she was taller than him and she loved that fact.

She stood very close, and whispered in his ear, “Business is always what I go for first, Wolverine, but you never know, if it’s worth it, I could always find the time to mix some pleasure in with it.”

They shared the same breath a moment, their lips not but a fraction apart.

She gave him a to-die-for smile, “Lets go Forge.”

Forge quickly stood up and made his way to the lift.

“See ya around, Wolvie.” She bumped her hips and backside into Logan’s groin lightly and walked away, swaying for all she was worth.

Logan took a deep breath and let it out slowly.

Come on, use me, she’s asking for it…

SHUT. UP.

Logan made his way over to the bar to try and ignore the voice again.

Only this time, it wasn’t coming from his blaster

Nothing like a bit of professional rivalry.

Three hours and four bottles of Den-certified rotgut later, Logan made his way back to the hangar. He just wanted to work on his baby and not think. A little bit of grease-slinging was just what he needed to get his mind clear, not to mention, he was worried about what Wilson was doing to his ship by now.

If he paints the Olsen twins on my hull one more time, I’m gonna give him a blaster charge enema.

Entering the hangar, Logan smiled upon seeing his ship. No Olsen twins, no Hello Kitty pink highlights, no “Deadpool rules” painted anywhere, everything seemed to be fine.

Logan shrugged his coat off and undid the locks on his armor. The containment gases hissed out, and the large chest plate went lax. He threw it near his tools, and stretched out his body.

“Ya know, I have to say if I was a chick, I would be totally into you.”

Logan cracked his neck and rotated his shoulders. “I wonder about ya sometimes, Wilson.”

Wade popped out from the hull panel he had been working on, the face mask over his head revealing the scarred visage underneath. “Hey, I am more than secure enough in my masculinity, thank you very much.”

Logan plopped down on the ground and began unhinging a hull plate. The stabilizers underneath were fickle of late.

“So, did ya kill anybody?”

“No.”

“Maim anybody?”

Logan peered up at him with a dangerous eye. “Not yet.”

”Damn, now I owe Marko twenty plat; you know, sometimes, you can really disappoint me, Wolvie.”

Logan rolled his eyes as he yanked the plate off, “Oh, now that’ll keep me up in the wee hours of the morning.”

“So how did your little talk go, anyway?”

“Don’t want to talk about it.”

“Never mind; ‘nuff said.”

Logan pried the stabilizer unit out and noticed the burnt edges; needs a new one.

He walked over to his cache of parts and began fishing for the replacement.

“Didn’t you and she used to be partners?”

Logan sighed loudly; leave it to Wilson to rub at a raw nerve.

“Don’t wanna to talk about it.”

Ah-ha, paydirt! Wade thought as he started replacing the panel he had finished with. “She is hot, Wolvie, I mean she’s no Bea Arthur, but kudos to you, big time!”

“Wade, I swear if ya keep this up, I’ll see what a toothbrush is capable of.” Logan found the replacement, got back on the ground and went back to work.

“Okay, okay, touchy, jeez, I see you don’t want any of my sparkling conversation and I am fine with that, so we will just sit here and work in complete and total silence.” Wade went to the next singed panel and started to remove it. “Total silence, that’s what we shall have, I needed time to contemplate on things myself.”

Logan placed the stabilizer in and began tightening it down, trying his best to ignore his sometime partner.

“Yep, not a peep anymore, I mean we can’t get any work done with yakking all the time, so let’s zip it and get to it, I can stand the silence, I know some people have a problem with it, but no not this Hunter, I can stay silent for days, not even a whisper coming from my mouth! That’s a very hard thing for some to do but me, I have it down to art form, I am probably sure I hold the record for it, I think, kind of like armpit musicals, did you know I hold the record for longest performance on at least twelve different worlds, I thought of going professional, but you know the Hunter business is the life for me, I still wonder what sometimes…”

“SHUT UP!”

“So when’s our next job?” Wade asked, smiling down at him.

Realizing that a blissful silence was an impossibility, Logan ran a hand down his face, easing the homicidal intent begging to be set free. “I have no clue when YOUR next job is. Mine is when Anna gets me the first decent one out there.”

“Oh, come on,” Wade whined. “You and me, me and you, we are a great team; I mean, Wolverine and Deadpool, man, that just sounds scary.”

Especially to me, Logan grimaced as he caught his finger on the sharp edge of the latch, bleeding for a moment before the wound closed.

“Come on, we make a great team you and me, remember that job we did on Thayo? That was the stuff of legends.”

Logan snorted. “Ya almost got us killed on that.”

“Did not.”

“Did too.”

“Did not, did not.”

Logan leaned up on his elbow, “Ya used ten pounds of C4 in the trunk of a hover as the diversion.”

“Yeah, so?”

“We were still in the hover when ya set the timer genius. Ya gave us five seconds, I had to crash it into the warehouse where were supposed to make the pickup, then we spent an hour chasing down Gargan and have to go through his bodyguards, all armed with high-frequency blasters, and do ya remember what ya brought that day, Wade?

Wade thought a moment and then smiled. “Oh yeah, I had Vera.”

Logan sighed, “Yeah, and ya took out half of the complex we were in with that damn cannon of yours, left Gargan a bloody stain on the ground, and I was digging shrapnel out of my face for a week.”

Wade said nothing for a moment, then smiled and raised his arms out. “That’s how I roll.”

Logan’s eye twitched a bit. “It’s a damn good thing Gargan was worth just the same dead as alive.”

“I don’t know why you’re complaining, you made me scoop up what was left of him for positive I.D. Do you know how bad brain matter stains red armor, I tell ya, not even Mr. Clean and the Scrubbing Bubbles themselves could get that stain out.”

Logan looked up at him, giving him that tired, pleading look that screamed for quiet.

“We got the job done and we made it home. No biggie.”

“We had so much heat on our tails, I could have roasted marshmallows with my ass.” Logan added. “Anna still gives me hell about how much legal work it took to keep our asses employed.”

Wade nodded, “Yeah, I know, I know, she hid all my chimichangas, too.”

“What I’m tryin’ to say here, Wilson, is that I’d rather piss glass than to have you on a hunt with me again,” Logan said, slapping the hull plate back on and standing up.” We both do better on our own, anyway.”

“Still think we could be the next Butch and Sundance.”

“They were killed by lawmen, Wilson.”

Wade looked at him, shocked. “You mean somebody killed Paul Newman and Robert Redford? LIES!!”

Logan sighed and rubbed his face.

“Don’t get him started on the difference between reality and fiction, sugah,” Anna said, walking into the hangar and swinging her hips. “Stop before he gets on his spiel about how we all just live in the imagination of some guy at his computer, typing out our life story.”

“It’s not my fault no one can handle the truth. I’m tellin’ ya, the guy is big and hairy and drinks way to much Vault,” Wade insisted, pulling his mask back over his face and walking to where Anna and Logan stood.

Logan had a pleading look on his face. “Please tell me ya got something for me, Darlin’.”

Anna smiled. “Bow down and kiss my toes, Logan. After I give you this, you will owe me one of your back rubs.”

“How come I never get a back rub?” Wade asked no one in particular.

Logan ignored him and looked at Anna with anxiety.

“Cameron Hodge, some sleazy former Law rep, who decided to go forward with some very incriminating evidence on a CrimSyn, headed by one Antonio Roccamora, aka Hammerhead.”

“This ain’t a black run, is it darlin’? You know how I feel about working for the Reds,” Logan stated.

Anna shook her head no. “He got out from under Federal protection, thought he could do better on his own, and now he’s scared shitless and wants back in, but Federation says they won’t lift a finger to help him unless he comes back in on his own.”

“So I find him, pick him up, and Federation takes it from there.”

Anna nodded. “Sixty thousand plats, Logan, for a simple grab and bag. You may commence with the butt-kissing, now.”

Wade whistled and Logan smiled.

“Anybody ever tell you that you’re a little piece of Heaven incarnate?” he asked, looking over the contract with disbelieving eyes.

“Only the guys that ever woke up in my bed, and sugah, you have not even gotten close to that,” she winked. “But you may not want to get to happy with me yet. You aren’t the only one on this hunt.”

Logan’s smile froze on his face. “Don’t tell me…”

Anna painfully nodded at him. “She left almost a half an hour ago.”

Logan bolted for his armor and began strapping it back on. “Get the ship ready, I am NOT losing this one.”

Wade was almost jumping up and down with excitement. “OH! OH! Can I come?”

Logan eyed him while reattaching the armor clamps to one another. “This is a pickup Wilson, not a burn’em down to lawn mulch.”

Wade got right in front of Logan’s face with his hands in prayer form. “I’ll be subtle, I promise, no explosions, no wild fire, no Backstreet Boys in the ship!”

Logan stared at him with disbelieving eyes.

“Come on, if I do, you can shoot me.”

Logan snorted. “You’ll heal; where’s the fun in that?”

Deadpool had an almost innocent, begging look about him, and Logan finally sighed. “If ya do anything other than what I say, then I use the claws instead of the blaster.”

Wade gave him a Boy Scout salute. “Yes sir, be right back, gotta grab my stuff!”

As he ran out of the hangar, Anna gave Logan a stern glance.

“What?”

“If you two get into the kind of trouble like you did last time, enjoy the slam because I sure as hell ain’t bailing you out again.”

Logan smiled at her. “Don’t worry, Darlin, I have no plans on waiting.”

Strapping on the last lock of his armor, he dashed for his ship and closed the hatch. The engines were activated and a few minutes later, The Canuk was gone.

Wade came barreling back into the hangar, swords strapped to his back, and several high-powered assault weapons on each arm. He looked around the empty hangar and finally settled on Anna’s apologetic smile.

“I got punked, didn’t I?”

Placing an arm around his sagging shoulders, Anna walked Wade out. “Don’t be upset sugah, tell ya what. I’ll give you some of those chimichangas I have.”

Wade looked at her with a pout, “Can we watch the Ernest Borgnine marathon on Vid?

Anna nodded.

“Okay,” he said, already back to his upbeat self.

He whistled “Bye Bye Bye” all the way down the hall.

Personal shuttle,

The Windrider

Ororo ran a sharpening card down the length of her retractable forearm blades. She checked them and decided they were good enough and returned them to their holding spot in her forearm bracers.

Logan’s little cornpone rep should have given him word about the Hodge contract by now, and if he’s anything like he used to be, he is now probably flying full speed for Delcore

She leaned back in her chair and sighed, relaxed. It was going to be a lot of fun to see him flip out again after she got another contract out from under his nose. Logan’s ship was faster than hers, but with the intel that Forge had gotten, she knew exactly where Hodge was hiding.

She laughed brilliantly at the thought of seeing Logan’s face contorted in a mask of anger. The money was good and all, she would take it of course, but the reaction from her former partner and lover was the true reward of it all.

The Canuk

Logan was pushing the ship for all it was worth. She may have a head start on him, but his baby would get to Delcore a good forty-five minutes before her, and then he would get to be the smug one.

Logan leaned back in his seat with a devilish grin. Ororo wasn’t gonna make him look like an ass this time. This time he’d be on top.

Just like the old days.

Logan let a laugh bubble out of his throat as his ship soared through the spaceways

Sure Isn’t Coffee and Doughnuts

Delcore was one of the prime business centers of the galaxy, also making it a prime target for organized crime. Hammerhead had his fingers in extortion, number running, arms dealing, and protection; any way there was to make an illegal profit was prime game for him.

Logan had met Hammerhead once. He didn’t think much of the John Gotti wannabe, either. They had parted on less than friendly terms, and even though no hit was put out on him, he knew Roccamora would love the chance to burn him down at the next possible meeting.

All the more reason to make this a quick one.

Logan had hit up his usual sources. He had a few snitches on almost every planet in the Core; some he paid for the information, others were given the less than subtle method. He decided to try Toombs; the old con always had his ear to the ground for these kinds of things.

He found him in one of the old dives in the old sector, a shack of a place where the booze was as bad as the smell. Logan winced as he entered; the stench of urine was harsh.

On a rundown stool sat Toombs. The old man was knocking back shots of the stuff they tried to call whiskey and looking a little worse for wear.

Logan took a seat next to him and looked over with a smile.

Toombs was mid-shot when he saw the Hunter.

He spit out a large bit of liquor, hopped from the seat and ran to the door.

Logan grinned all the wider as he rose and pulled out his blaster. The bartender said nothing, only winced and ducked down behind the bar.

“Oh, Toomby,” Logan said, his voice sing-song, “where ya goin’ ole buddy?”

He fired a shot at the door, singeing the handle and making the few passed-out patrons moan in pain at the noise. Toombs stopped frozen, staring wide-eyed at the door that had just been marked by blaster fire. He flinched as Logan came behind him and draped an arm over his shoulder.

“Ya know, Toomby, ya keep runnin away from me every time I come to see ya, and I might get he impression ya don’t like me very much.”

Toombs laughed nervously. “Now that would be the furthest thing from the truth there man! I just remembered I had to pick my kid up from the day care.”

Logan swung him around and threw him down into a nearby chair. “You having kids is a disturbing idea, bub. If yer gonna lie to me, at least tell me something that won’t make me nervous for the development of the species.”

Logan walked to the bar and took one of the bottles on the counter and sat back down next to Toombs. “Drink?”

“Ya know, I am trying to cut down lately,” he responded.

“Next thing you’ll be telling me is that you’re joining the priesthood.”

“I always heard you can’t beat their retirement plan,” he answered and took a long sip from the offered bottle. “Well, I guess you’re not here to keep the gossip up to date, eh?”

“Actually, that is just what I need from you, Toomby.” He took a small gulp from the bottle; damn donkey piss. “I need some info on a guy named Hodge, Cameron Hodge, some former law rep that stepped into a big ole pile of steaming trouble.”

“Hodge? Hmmm, nope, don’t know anything.”

Logan placed his blaster on the table and dug into his coat pocket. He produced a small stack of plats and threw them in front of the con. “Know anything now?’

Toombs picked up the money and quickly counted it. “You know, it is on the tip of my tongue, but it just isn’t ringing any bells.”

Logan loudly cracked his knuckles under the table. “Don’t make me ring those bells for ya, Toomby.”

The thought of an adamantium-reinforced fist against the head made Quasimodo get back to work on those bells in Toombs’ brain. “Oh. Hodge, yea, that’s right, yea, I heard a little through the grapevine about him.”

“Well, time to start squeezing them grapes, then.” Logan leaned forward and snatched the bottle away from Toombs.

Forty-five minutes later:
Logan stood in the alleyway near the place Toombs had sworn on his unborn children that Hodge was holding up in. His timetable was running a bit close for his taste; it was past time to make a move.

Logan checked the charges on his blasters before moving them both to the shoulder holsters under his coat. He moved from the alley and briskly made a walk for the hotel that Hodge had supposedly been occupying these past few weeks. It was a nice place, large and well furnished, but not the best place to be when the Reds had a hit out on ya. A public place wasn’t always the way to go. Way too many people had access to ya in these conditions.

Still should make my job a bit easier to get to him, Logan thought.

Right before the automatic doors opened for him, an explosion rocked the building, and a gust of fire threw him back onto the street. The screams and alarms were both blaring, as people fled and scattered from the burning building.

Logan picked himself up off the ground and cracked his neck. He had a large piece of glass shard embedded in his forehead, and his armor bore fresh singe marks. He reached up and yanked the glass out painfully and threw it aside.

He sighed as he saw the lights of approaching authorities and Fire containment units.

“Sixty thousand plats up in fucking smoke,” he cursed and kicked at the shattered pieces of glass at his feet. “Can’t I just once catch a break in this damn…”

He trailed off as he saw a tall, thin man in a ruined business suit stumble out of the broken doors and run screaming down the street. It was Hodge.

Logan cocked his brow and looked up into the sky. “Uh…thanks.”

As Logan ran after his quarry, a pair of bodies came flying out of the ruined front doors. They slammed into the street as the gale force wind died down around them. As they tried to raise themselves up, they were met with a hard kick to the face from a pair of stiletto heels.

Ororo gave each another quick kick to the side of the head for good measure and took a few deep breaths. It had all been going so well. She had found Hodge’s hideaway, snuck in, and after some “polite” conversation, convinced the little weasel that his best chance for living to see another day was to accompany her off-world. Just as they exit the lift, a pair of Reds detonate a small thermo charge and almost brings the house down on their heads.

It had all been going so well.

She pulled a small device from inside her coat and switched it on. The tracer she had stuck on Hodge’s coat was still active. Even though Hodge had been in her custody, in the Hunter lifestyle, one never should count their money prematurely. Ororo ducked into the alleys and followed the tracer signal.

Meanwhile, Logan was still in pursuit of the half-crazed and half-charred man running down the street. The scrawny slime must be pumping so much adrenaline that it was a wonder he had not caused his heart to burst.

Hodge’s suit still smoked from the burnt spots, and even from the distance Logan could pick out the trace of urine from the man. He did not have to worry much about losing him. A half naked man trailing smoke and screaming to the top of his lungs just tended to draw attention on a busy street such as this.

Logan’s break came when the delirious man took a turn into one of the nearby alleyways. Pushing his legs harder, Logan closed the distance with ease. A bull rush tackle later and three hundred pounds of adamantium and flesh rested atop Cameron Hodge’s chest.

“Oh, God, please don’t kill me!” he practically screamed. “Please, I’ll pay whatever you want, just don’t kill me!”

Logan rolled his eyes and hauled Hodge to his feet. “Just calm down, bub.”

“Please, I’ll double what Hammerhead is paying you, just let me go.”

“I don’t work for Roccamora, so just calm down!” The need to just wallop him upside the head was really growing inside of Logan. “Just calm down and I’ll get ya out of here.”

Hodge still was on the verge of hyperventilating, but he did manage to stop flailing about. “Are you from the Guild? A Hunter?”

Logan nodded slowly. “Yup, and I’m here to get ya out. My ship isn’t far, so all we gotta do is high tail it there and then we’re home free.”

‘What about your partner?’ he asked in a still trembling voice.

“Partner?”

The sound of a charged blaster rang in his ears and Logan saw Hodge’s eyes go wide.

“Yes, Wolverine, what about your partner?’

That voice.

That sweet, sultry voice.

That sweet, sultry, Hells be damned voice, which haunted both his nightmares and more than one of his dreams.

Logan was grinding his teeth, and he turned and saw Storm with a blaster pointed at his chest. “Figures.”

She smiled at him and took a few steps closer. “You are such a bad boy, Wolvie, don’t you know that I have already laid my claim?’

“Well, I should know; ya’ve laid just about everything else this side of the quadrant.”

Ororo tsked him. “Do you always have to be so vulgar?”

“Do ya always have to be a thieving bitch?” Logan fired right back.

She scoffed at him. “You never change, do you? I cannot believe that the two of us were ever together.”

“Best times of yer life, Darlin’.”

With a speed that she could barely follow, Logan pulled his own blaster from his coat holster. Ororo did not flinch; neither of them did. Hodge was trying his able best to sink into and become a part of the alley wall.

Their eyes remained locked on each other. A clashing of wills was taking place, and both knew the other would never back down.

“Weigh your options, Darlin’,” Logan said. “Ya blast me and I’ll be up and good as new in no time. You can’t say the same.”

“I could see how many volts of lightning it takes to turn you into a Christmas tree,” she replied, letting that wicked, almost playful gleam in her eyes shine.

“I’d smell the ozone and burn ya down before ya even had a chance to go all Thor on me, honeybunch.” Logan took a strong step forward. Their blasters were now side by side each other. “But by all means, Darlin, take yer best shot.”

“You know, the tough guy act was cute for the first ten minutes, but it got old really quick, Wolverine. Why don’t you just accept that you are in a situation where you don’t have total control,” Ororo said.

“Um, excuse me,” Hodge said, finally building up enough courage to speak.

“Oh, I got control,” Logan said, ignoring Hodge, “my gun in your face seems like a world of control to me.”

“You seem to forget that my gun is in your face, too,” Ororo said.

“Excuse me,” Hodge said a bit louder this time but still for naught.

“That little pussy Four-nine charge blaster couldn’t burn the leftovers off my dishes, Darlin.”

“Bet it could make you a foot shorter, and sweetheart, you barely meet the requirements for anything but the kiddie rides to begin with.”

“Excuse me!”

“Oh, the Ice Queen makes a joke!” Logan was half snarling, half smirking. “Geez, Darlin, how long have ya been holding on to that one?”

“You are such a child,” Ororo scoffed. “Thank the Goddess for showing me where my mind was and correcting a possible lifetime mistake.”

Logan bared his teeth. “Yea, and yer little Goddess led ya right into the arms of that slick shit geriatric.”

“Forge is more of a gentleman than you could ever even imagine, Logan,” she sneered.

“Yea, and I bet that his Viagra bill is a bitch too!” he laughed.

“You bastard!”

“Bitch!”

“Asshole!”

“Tight ass!”

They had not even noticed that their guns were lowered and that they were standing chest to chest against each other, their faces close and lips even closer.

“Animal.” Ororo breathed the word out slowly. Her breath was hot and smooth against his cheeks.

“Tease,” Logan growled out softly, sending a shiver through her shoulders.

Their eyes locked and they moved closer…

“EXCUSE ME!!!”

The two hunters whirled around in frustration. “WHAT??” they shouted in unison.

“I think I’m in trouble,” Hodge said, bringing his hand up from his side and showing them it was covered in blood before he passed out and fell to the alley ground.

“Ah, shit,” they both breathed.

Do you know those days when it feels like life has a row of jokes lined up like extravagant layout of dominoes, and each and every one of them slaps you in the face on its way down?

The kind of day where it seems, God props up his feet with a cold one and a giant bowl of popcorn and sees just how much fun he can have with you and fate.

Well, if that was the case, Logan was sure that his life was better than a Three Stooges marathon.

His life was the theater screen, and every laser bolt that flew overhead from his ducked down position was the Big Guy hurling juju beans.

Blasters gripped in his hands, Logan leaned against the dumpster and sighed loudly.

“Will you shoot something, please”?

That voice again.

“Sorry, Satan, did you say something?” he said, firing off a few rounds, “I can’t hear ya over all the fucking blaster fire.”

Ororo Munroe scoffed at him. “You see what happens when you use shit for brains; it tends to clog up your eardrums, too.”

“Shut it lady, or I’ll use ya as a human shield to get out of the mess you got me into!” It dawned on him; that might not be a bad idea, he thought, smiling.

“Would be a sensible idea since you can just about hide behind my thigh,” she countered

“Well,” he said, sending another salvo of shots at the men who had pinned them down, “with the way your ass has gotten lately, I sure would have a broad width of protection.”

Storm stopped mid-shot and looked over at him with shock and a hint of hurt in her brilliant eyes.

“You. Bastard.” She hissed, her jaw hanging.

“Truth hurts, Darlin,” he shrugged.

She narrowed her eyes and began firing blasts in rapid succession. “When this is over, Wolverine, I am going to do the galaxy a favor and shoot you right in the crotch.”

Logan pulled a pair of thermo grenades from his belt and hit the pins.

“Grab Hodge!” he said and hurled the two explosives over the dumpster.

Ororo picked up the wounded man and slung his limp arm around her shoulder. Logan grabbed the other arm and did the same just as the grenades detonated, sending a shockwave of force and heat in all directions.

The three would-be assassins were sent flying back in a wave of dust and wreckage. One with an empty socket where his arm should have been.

Logan and Ororo hurried down the alley dragging the dead weight of Hodge. The little sissy had only been grazed by the first shot, but the sight of his own blood was just too much for him to bear.

“Where are we going?” Ororo ground out through clenched teeth.

“Fucking Disneyland! Where do you think? Were getting to my ship,” Logan shouted and pulled them further along.

“I am not getting on that hunk of crap you call a ship,” she said, trying to match his pace. “My ship is closer.”

“I’m not leaving the Canuk on this lousy rock, so you can just put a sock in it and do it, or you can piss off,” Logan countered.

“Well, I’m not leaving The Windrider here either, that ship cost me a fortune.”

“My ship is faster!”

She scoffed. “Yeah, it plummets to the ground like none I’ve ever seen.”

Logan stopped and slung Hodge against the far wall. He bounced off it and made a low, high-pitched whine. “Let me put it this way: Hodge and me are getting on my ship, you can do whatever the fuck you want. Come with me, get to your ship, go have a fucking latte for all I care.”

Logan picked Hodge back up and held him close like one would do when caring for a friend who had too much to drink. “All I know is that he is with me.”

Ororo grabbed Hodge’s other arm. “Well, I’m glad that you’ve finally come out of the closet Logan, you’ll make a cute couple, I’m sure, but for the time being I need him.”

If any passerby were to see this, it would be a humorous spectacle to behold. The two finest bounty hunters in the entire universe were pulling on the arms of an unconscious man as a pair of children would when fighting for the same toy.

“I’m not playing with you, Ororo!” Logan growled out. “Let him go, or I will hurt you.”

“You don’t have the guts anymore, Wolverine, a hunter like you should have either shot me when you first saw me or left me back there to die, You play at being hard, but I know where the soft spot is on that soft little underbelly of yours You haven’t changed any since the War, no wonder they discharged you for that mess on Carnore…”

A fire lit in Logan’s eyes, and with a quick thrust, he sent Hodge and Storm into the wall. Ororo fell down in a tumble and was on her way up when a pair of claws shot out on either side of her throat.

She knew what she had done.

She knew she had crossed a line.

Logan’s face was a mask of barely concealed fury. “You better watch what you say to me, Ororo, or I will show you just how callous that soft spot has gotten.”

“Either let me up, Logan or I swear, I will call up a light show that will leave you nothing but a pile of charred adamantium,” she promised as the energy crackled at her fingertips.

Logan could smell the ozone strongly. He knew she was not kidding, but then again, neither was he.

He retracted the claws and stood up. The energy in her hands dissipated, and they were back to the business at hand.

Logan ran a hand down his face and sighed, trying to control the lingering anger he felt. “Look, I know who is after us, and believe me, were going to need to get off this rock discreetly; my ship is faster and it has a cloak. We take your ship and we’re sitting ducks in the air.”

Ororo was stern. “I said I am not leaving my ship behind.”

“Oh Jesus, woman, you can get another!” Logan said, the exasperation coating his voice. “Last time I checked, God didn’t have any wholesales on extra lives, but I have been out of the loop on that lately, so maybe you know a guy.”

Ororo rolled her eyes. “If I’m going to leave my ship behind, I expect compensation.”

Ah, hell, Logan thought, she used the C word.

“And that would be?” Logan braced himself as best he could.

“I want Seventy percent of the bounty,” she said.

Logan felt another blood vessel pop and his last nerve give way. “No. Fucking. Way.”

“Then we may as well start killing each other now, because if that is not the deal, then I am taking him to my ship.” She stood to her full height and her eyes took on that haunting white.

Of all the devices of torture that had been made in the history of the universe, Logan was sure that not a more devious one had ever been made than this woman. “Forty.”

“Seventy.”

“I meant forty-five.”

“I meant seventy.”

Cracking his knuckles, Logan sighed, “Fifty percent, Storm if you don’t take that, then let’s just you and me throw down now.”

Ororo smiled to herself. That had been easier than she thought. She had left her ship in the care of an associate of hers and it would be safe. She also knew that at this point she would either have to work with Logan on this or risk losing the whole contract. The Canuk had the cloaking tech to get them off the planet without any problems, now, with the entire ruckus that had been made; they would need a quiet getaway. Still, she had not expected to get him up to fifty percent.

“Deal. Your powers of negotiating are amazing, Wolvie.” she said smiling.

Logan flashed his teeth at her and the two began moving again. They had reached the Canuk a few minutes later; Logan threw Hodge into one of the passenger seats and strapped him in. Ororo eyed the interior of the ship and shook her head.

“Surprised not to see beer cans and Playboys spread over the consoles,” she mused as she sat and strapped in.

Logan plopped down into the pilot chair and heated up the engine core. “Keep those in the back.”

A soft hum sounded as the engines were brought on line, and they were off the ground. Logan clicked a few controls, and a strange noise and a brilliant shimmer spread over the length of the ship. The cloaking tech activated and they were off the grid and out of sight.

Logan would not feel comfortable, though, until they broke atmosphere. He angled the ship skyward and pushed the engines harder until the pale blue turned into deep black with tiny dots of light.

Leaning back, he exhaled a sigh of relief. There wasn’t any COM traffic that hinted at any type of standing alert for cruisers in the vicinity, so at this point all was well and good. Logan smiled a bit as he thought of the look on Hammerhead’s face when he got the news of the latest screwing he had been dealt. A black run contract was almost a sure bet this time, one more road to cross when he had to.

For now, though, it was a win.

He knew what it was going to cost him, but a win is a win.

Don’t argue with it when you don’t have to.


The Den


After almost a two-hour trip, Logan stepped off the ship and breathed fast and rapid breaths. That woman was killing him. Bitch, bitch, bitch about this and complain, complain, complain about that.

“Fucking A, woman, please stop revving your menstrual cycle, I can’t take being run over by it again.”

Ororo rolled her eyes as she stepped from the ship. ‘Another witty remark from Shakespeare himself.”

Anna was waiting for him as usual. The look in her pretty green eyes was almost enough to make him crack a smile when she saw Ororo step off his boat.

She eyed him as if he had grown another head; actually, that would be much more believable than what she thought she was seeing.

“Uh…Logan?” she started, pointing to the taller woman.

He raised his hand and violently shook his head. “For the love of all that is good in this piss poor universe, don’t ask.”

Anna’s eyebrows were almost touching the ceiling. “Is there anything I need to know?”

Logan slowly turned his head to face Ororo. “Just that she helped me get out of the fire, we went partners on this, and we agreed on half.”

After hearing this, Anna was sure that all was not right in this galaxy. “Ok, who are you and where is my grumpy, mean, homicidal and greedy Wolverine?”

“He’s still here, but he’s just too fucking tired to argue about it.” Logan dragged his feet over to the lift

Anna looked from him to Ororo and just shook her head. The world had gotten just a little too weird for her, but she would do as she was asked.

“I saw a two-headed calf once, I thought it was the strangest thing ever,” she said to Ororo. “A new milestone has just been made in my life today.”

Ororo cracked a small smile at her and shouted to a slowly retreating Logan, “Nice working with you again, Sweetheart; maybe it won’t be the last time.”

Logan placed both hands on the closing lift doors to keep them open and leaned his head forward. “Lady I will have full-grown bull elephants fly out of my ass wearing funny little hats ‘fore I ever work with you again.”

And with that the lift closed.


Dorm # 616


Logan wanted nothing more than a cold beer, a good cigar, a place to prop his feet up and just a little quiet.

His hopes were dashed to a thousand pieces when he stepped into the dorm.

Before him stood a truly terrifying sight.

Wearing only his trademark black and red mask and a pair of Transformers boxers was a singing and dancing Wilson cooking at the food prep.

“Heavy boots of lead, fills his victims full of dread, running as fast as they can IRON MAN LIVES AGAIN!”

For one horrifying second, Logan could not turn away as Wade began playing a (quite good) air guitar solo that matched perfectly with the music blaring on the small stereo he kept in the kitchen.

“DAH DAH DAH DA DA…” Wade stopped as he saw a stunned into silence Wolverine standing near the front door. He threw his head around in a huff and went back to his cooking

Logan shook his head clear and threw his coat onto one of the nearby chairs. “Ozzy you’re not, Wilson.”

“Not speaking to you,” he said.

“Who says there isn’t a God.” Logan said, undoing the latches on his armor and grabbing a beer out of the fridge. It was his last one, after this he would either have to spend a fortune for the real thing or go back to drinking syntho. After this day though, he figured he earned it.

He plopped down onto the small sofa and took a long and deep swig from the bottle and for one moment he was at peace with the universe.

“I want you to know something.”

And the peace was destroyed by the big bang that was Wade Wilson’s mouth.

“You’re going to need me one day, and I just might not be there and then your gonna be like ’If only the great and powerful Deadpool was here to pull my hairy posterior out of this mess‘ and you know what, then you will see.”

“See what?”

“That you need me.”

Logan shook his head and drained the rest of the beer dry.

“Come on, you know I would even take a bullet for you,” Wade cried as he jumped up and down like a spoiled three year old.

“Tell ya what, Wilson, take a few right now for me and let me get some rest and then we’ll talk,” Logan said as he leaned back into the sofa with hopes of a few hours sleep.

Underneath his mask, Wade took on a smug expression. ‘HA HA! I am wearing you down, Wolvie; we’ll be the next dynamic duo yet! I’m Batman, you’re Robin, together taking on the world.”

Logan had finally passed into sleep and was spared of Wade’s approximately three-hour ramble of how they would need the costumes, a Deadmobile, deadarangs, and something about Anti-Shark Dead spray.

Four hours later

Logan was having a truly remarkable dream about an island paradise filled with beautiful women in grass skirts fanning him and massaging his feet, and buckets upon buckets of beer being laid out before him when Anna burst into the room.

Logan instinctively popped his claws but retracted them just as quick. “Hey, sorry darlin’, didn’t mean to scare ya.”

Anna looked like she had seen a ghost but deep inside Logan knew he was not the cause of it. “What’s the matter, darlin’? Trouble? Catching shit from the guild higher ups over the Hodge thing?”

Anna shook her head a slow no.

Logan ground his teeth, “Is it Storm again I swear I’m gonna kill that pain in the….”

Anna moved to the Holo vid and turned it on and switched to the nearest News feed. ”You are going to want to see this Logan.”

The vid flipped on to a pretty young reporter in the field. There was a lot of activity going on behind her.

“This is Trish Tilby with News feed 7, I am on the site of the planet Nayora in the Gamma Sigma sector with this breaking news.”

Logan leaned in close to the vid as Anna sat next to him and placed her hand over his. She was shaking like a leaf in a strong wind.

“Approximately twelve hours ago, the capital of Nayora, Teldrao, was attacked and laid siege to by a then unknown assailant, casualties are high and damage is at an almost incalculable level, This reporter had a chance to speak to several of the few survivors of the attack.”

The vid switched to an older man with burn marks over the left side of his face. “It happened like nothing I ever seen, it was so loud, like thousands of people screaming at the top of their lungs just over and over again, then it just went quiet, and then…they came, God there were so many of them, they were so fast, so inhuman. I’ll never forget that sound they made, that gears whirling sound and then…then when they took my daughter…” He started to break down into a torrent of tears, “That sucking sound, when they pierced her body, Oh God…Oh God…”

The news feed switched back to the reporter. “There have been few survivors. Federation officials and military are on site but are refusing to comment on anything at this time; however, an amateur photographer managed to get this image not moments before the attack.”

The vid shifted to the picture of a giant ship in low orbit. It was a massive thing that looked like an unholy blending of metal and twisted flesh.

Logan’s blood ran cold. He knew what it was.

“Ladies and Gentleman, if this picture holds to be true than fifteen years after the dreadful War that tore through our galaxies, The Nurachni have returned.”

Fifteen years ago
The Terran-Nurachni War

The Asgard Star Cluster

Command Carrier 117A The Patriot

Brigadier General Anthony Stark sat and waited as patiently as was possible for him, twirling a pen between his fingers. He reached over and took a small sip of water from the glass on his neat and orderly desk. He sat it down, cleared his throat, and looked sternly at the soldier sitting across from him.

Captain Steve Rogers sat upright and to attention, meeting his superior officer’s gaze with unflinching eyes. He had been here almost twenty minutes, waiting in a very awkward situation for their always-late third party to arrive.

Outside, he was a picture of discipline and profession, on the inside; however, his mind was swirling with anticipation.

The man could not just do him a single favor and be on time for once, Steve thought as the General began drumming on the desktop with the pen.

The sound of the lift door opening and heavy footfalls finally gave him the relief he had been desperately praying for.

Captain Logan Howlett strolled in without a care in the world. He was dressed in his Civvies, complete with snakeskin boots and an old worn cowboy hat.

He plopped down in the chair next to Steve and gave him a wink and the barest of grins.

“I called for you almost half an hour ago, Howlett, or did you forget that we are trying to fight a war here?” Stark asked. His disdain for the man saturated his voice.

Logan turned his attention to the CO and shrugged. “Yes, Sir, sorry, Sir; was hoping the war would be over by the time I got up here.”

Stark ground his teeth; the man really could send him over the edge. “You will be going on report, Captain, and you shall be reprimanded.”

Logan saluted him. “Sir. I do believe I deserve it, Sir.”

Steve was almost wincing at his best friend’s words and the looks the General was giving him.

Stark all but hated Logan with a passion. That was common knowledge, to even the new recruits who had no doubt heard the stories of the two butting heads on so many occasions. The list of reprimands he had given him almost matched the string of medals that he had been forced to bestow upon him.

It didn’t matter much, Steve knew, Stark would never have him decommissioned and thrown out.

Logan was just too good.

The best at what he did.

And Stark was not proud enough to lose one of the only two Weapon Class soldiers he had.

Logan and Steve both were invaluable members of the operation here in Asgard. Their training and abilities made them the perfect spearhead for driving into the Nurachni territory.

And despite it all, Steve knew Logan’s heart was in it. He cared just as much as anyone else, even a bit more sometimes. Mutant, human, it didn’t matter; they were all fighting for the same thing.

Survival.

And both Steve and Logan knew that neither would want anyone else watching their backs than each other.

But Steve did admit to sometimes wanting to kick Logan’s ass himself for things such as this.

“Since you decided to take your time on getting here, I am now behind schedule and must take my leave,” Stark said, standing up from his seat.

Steve followed, with a sighing Logan doing the same.

“Hell, should have just stayed in my buck.”

Stark didn’t acknowledge the comment. He found it best right now for his state of mind to just ignore Logan as best as he could. “The Grand Admiral will be here within the hour and we have things to discuss, I will see the BOTH of you back in this office at precisely 1900 hours, for a pre-briefing.”

Logan rolled his eyes.

Pre-bullshit was more like it.

Steve saluted, as did Logan, who was only halfhearted about it, and the two men turned on their heels and left the office.

When the lift doors closed, Steve sighed.

“Thanks again for that, that makes what, three times in the past month?” he asked looking over at his smirking partner.

“Five, actually, but who the hell’s counting?” he quipped.

“You didn’t even come in your uniform.”

Logan winced. “Just the thought of that damn thing makes my skin crawl.”

“You know, with the medals you have, some guys would wear them to bed.”

Logan slapped him in the shoulder in a friendly gesture. “You have more than me and you don’t wear ‘em; I think that’s one of the reasons I like you so much, you fuckin’ Boy Scout.”

Steve smiled despite it all. The two were polar opposites in so many ways, but when it came down to a few things, they were the exact same.

“Just try to be on time for the next one; you know how well Stark and I get along.”

Logan smiled. Steve was a poster boy for the recruitment offices all right; a real by the book kind of guy, but Logan loved the fact that he also knew when to chuck the book right down the toilet.

The VERY few reprimands on his record were because of Logan himself. Steve and Stark both never got along all that much, but there was a solid respect between the two. Logan never forgot the fact that Steve had sacrificed his perfect record and his rocky relationship with Stark to take up for him in the past.

He smiled at Steve and shrugged. “No promises.”

Steve laughed and shook his head.

Logan slung an arm over his friend’s shoulder. “Fuck all the brass in the world for the time being bub, you and me are having a beer.”

“Long as it has a “Root” in front of it.”

Logan laughed out loud. “You fucking pansy.”

Officers lounge
They had been sitting and talking for hours now. They rarely ever had any time of late to talk about anything but the war, and it was good to unwind a bit.

A few members of each of their squads had come in and waved their greetings.

Bucky Barnes and Clint Barton were playing poker with a few others in the back and had invited the both of them to the game.

“Maybe later, Ladies, I’ll come over there and take all you girls’ money, but for right now you’re safe,” Logan answered.

Steve waved off the offer as well.

Another choice pair walked into the room and many eyes settled on them. Neena Thurman and Raven Darkholme both sauntered in and sat at the bar. Logan took in the sights enough to make Steve even blush a little.

“Damn, ain’t much finer than a good looking woman in a uniform.” Logan said, tipping the beer back.

Steve nodded in agreement; he had to concur with that statement.

Neena had turned around a moment and cast a small wink in Logan’s direction. Logan let a devil grin brim over his face.

The two were good friends, to say the least.

Neena was a strong and spirited woman.

And one hell of a kinky one, too.

Logan had a rule about officers and soldiers dating.

Don’t.

But getting laid?

Well, that was a different story.

No Strings.

That was always the arrangement.

When they needed to unwind and burn off a little excess energy, they knew that the other would be more than willing to comply.

They weren’t involved in the slightest other than being friends and the occasional lover.

Logan was just fine with that. He had no desire to get involved with a woman at this point in his life.

He had made that mistake and hated himself for it every day of his life.

He wondered if he would ever be ready for it.


”Carol says Hi, by the way; she sent a vid to me the other day.”

Carol Danvers.

Logan knew that God was having a great laugh over this. Just when he is thinking about the biggest mistake of his life, it comes crashing into him like a tidal wave.

“How is she?”

Steve took a sip of the soda and nodded. “Good, she’ll be in the Triskellion sector next week and will be on radio silence, so she wanted to get a word in before it went dark.”

Logan nodded and kept his eyes on his drink. “Good to hear she’s out of the line of fire.”

“Tell me about it.” Steve took another pull of the root beer. “Glad the last thing I need to worry about is my wife’s safety at this point in time.”

Logan said nothing, only nodded.

A lot of old things were creeping up in his mind.

Old feelings.

Old emotions.

Old regrets.

He had dated Carol long ago. She was a Lieutenant at the time in the Skybreaker unit, flyboys. Hoping to be a captain soon and tear up some space ways. She was a bit on the wild side, funny, damn smart and sexy as hell. Logan couldn’t resist even if he tried. It was nothing real serious, just the two having a good time, mostly. Logan knew it would not go anywhere, and also knew that Carol was a hell of a woman to keep on a string.

So he introduced her to Steve.

And damn if the sparks didn’t ignite like the sun.

Carol found Logan’s bad boy attitude attractive, but it was Steve’s wholesomeness that made her fall in love with the man.

Logan had to laugh at the time. He remembered hearing somewhere from someone that “You flirt with the dangerous guy but marry the good guy,” or some such shit as that.

They had dated for two years, and Logan had never seen Steve quite so alive. They had gone through the Project together, each being assigned to different divisions. Steve got he serum, Logan got his bones. It was a shitty time for both of them; Logan’s anger and Steve’s burden of responsibility were hard things for the both of them to overcome.

If it weren’t for each other, they were not sure where they would be now. During all that time though, Logan never thought he would see Steve really happy again as he was with Carol.

On the anniversary of their third year together, Steve proposed and Carol accepted.

Logan was the best man and he couldn’t have been happier for either of them.

Then the War started.

Steve was shipped out first.

He had to be the great shining light that drove all others forward.

In almost Four years the two had not been apart more than a few days at a time. It was hard on both of them, but both were professionals first and foremost.

Logan had not been shipped out yet. His unit was on an emergency standby while Federation forces began consolidating.

He and Carol were still good friends who enjoyed each other’s company, so they would go out a few nights a week for a few games of pool, couple drinks and just to raise a little hell.

They were having a really good time.

Too damn good of a time.

And one night, they let it get the best of them.

Carol had been lonely without Steve and Logan was filling a much-needed void in her mind and heart. So without either of them thinking the two had slept together in one night of hormone-driven passion.

While his best friend was out fighting for his life, Logan was at home fucking his wife.

After that, the both of them began drifting apart as friends. Carol still loved Steve with all her heart, and the both of them knew this beyond any question. They felt their guilt eat away at them like jackals on a rotted carcass.

They stopped seeing each other for the most part, and only talked sparingly.

They both went about their lives, though, never talking about what had happened.

And then Steve was wounded in action.

A nurachni War Bringer had put a Shard repeater on full auto and put about a dozen of the damn things in Steve’s back.

Logan and Carol were on the first trans to the med frigate where Steve was being treated.

When they got there, he was still in critical condition. The Soldier serum, they had said, was what was keeping him going; if not for that, he would have died on the spot.

They had both requested leave, and surprisingly enough, got it. Logan thanked General Nick Fury for pulling the strings on that one, so they were there for the entire time of Steve’s crucial moments.

The guilt had become too much for Logan to bear, though.

Just looking at Carol and thinking of Steve letting a fucking machine do his breathing for him was tearing him apart.

He finally told Carol that they should fess up.

She had gone ballistic on him, and after the outburst she broke down into tears. Logan would have liked to kick his own ass clear across the galaxy into the nearest black hole at that moment.

They held each other in the waiting room while she sobbed into his shoulder.

She had said only one thing to him the whole time.

“Please, for his sake, please don’t.”

And so he hadn’t.

Steve made a full recovery and was back on full duty a few months later. That serum they say saved his life, but Logan knew it was the man and not some damned magic potion that some asshole scientist cooked up.

Logan had carried that secret now for years, as had Carol. There were times, though, that looking at Steve and hearing him talk about Carol was gut wrenching.

“Good evening Sirs,” Raven said, thankfully breaking Logan out of his trance.

The blue-skinned woman pulled up a chair. “May I?”

Steve nodded. “Of course.”

Logan smiled, pushing all the old guilt and thoughts down. “Finally couldn’t resist coming over, huh, Lieutenant.”

She smiled, her perfectly red lips pulling back to show wonderfully white teeth. “Don’t think too much of yourself, Captain, I don’t want you to think I’m putting the moves on you.”

Logan shrugged and downed another gulp of beer. “You love me and you know it.”

She laughed, “I love my pet python too, but I wouldn’t take it to bed with me.”

“Ouch,” Steve said, snickering.

Logan grinned. “Guess not, cause me and that python share one or two similarities.”

“Squeezing the life out of things and devouring them whole?” she asked.

“That too,” Logan returned. “Now moving on from my anatomy, can we help you with something, LT?”

“Just curious about the next mission statement is all,” she said. “I hear we’re going to Pax.”

Logan waved that away. “Who the hell told you that?”

“Just through the grapevine is all; I hear they’re planning something big.”

“Don’t trust everything you hear from the Vine, LT,” Steve said. “You can hear some real misleading crap.”

“Yea, I heard that the project made you no longer anatomically correct to keep your mind on business,” Logan said, pointing to Steve.

“WHAT??” Steve almost shouted, a look of horror on his face.

“Vine said it, not me.” Logan raised his hands in defense.

“Anyway,” Steve continued, still casting baneful glances at Logan, “Pax is a prime Nurachni area; that would be a suicide run.”

“’Course, that’s what we are here for. “ Logan put in.

“Just a rumor.“ Raven said and stood up from her chair. “ Just was wondering if you had heard anything.”

“We should know something later today. We’ll pass it along in the team briefings,” Steve assured her.

She nodded. ‘Ok, then. Good day, Captain,” she said to Steve and turned to face Logan. “Later, Serpentor.”

Logan grinned at the leaving woman and took in a few eye views of her retreating form. “Women in uniforms.”

Steve raised his bottle in agreement and the two continued to drink.

Three hours later
Neena had come to his quarters a few minutes ago.

And Logan could smell what kind of mood she was in.

It was hard and rough and energetic.

The way both of them liked it.

She screamed as she reached her peak and gripped him tightly around the shoulders, sweating and breathing hard and fast.

Logan had not finished.

He couldn’t.

He lay back in the bed and Neena curled beside him.

She spoke after a moment. “Something is on your mind.”

“Nothing worth hearing.”

“When Logan Howlett doesn’t get off, you know something isn’t right in the universe,” she said, running a hand down his chest.

He smiled a bit. She really knew how he thought.

“Just got a feeling, is all.”

“You sure gave me a helluva feeling.” She smiled at him.

Logan chuckled only a bit as they both fell away into sleep.

Dark thoughts still haunted his mind all the while.

Two hours later
Logan had gotten cleaned up after his little nap; Neena gave him a deep and hard kiss before sneaking out of his quarters and back to her own.

Steve had agreed to meet him back in the lounge for a few rounds of poker before their big to do with the brass.

When he got there, Bucky and Barton were still playing along with other members of Logan’s own squad. David North pulled him out a chair, and Ben Grimm handed him a beer.

“Ready to lose some money half pint?” he asked.

“Well, your mom got a good portion of it already, Grimm, don’t think I have much to spare,” he said, snikting the cap off the top.

Steve walked in then, along with another member of his team, Janet Van Dyke.

They all sat down and were dealed in.

“The game is five card draw people, you can play or just go ahead and hand all of your hard earned federation plats over to me,” Barton said, slinging cards with unmatched accuracy.

“Keep talking your trash, Barton,” Grimm said, puffing away on a cigar.

Logan was laughing and enjoying himself on the outside, but deep down he still had that nagging feeling. He was thinking it was just over the whole Carol thing that had popped back into his mind.

But, that just wasn’t it.

He couldn’t believe it, but it felt even worse than that.

He nodded it away and got back to playing.

Janet was a hell of a player, as was North; Bucky, the poor guy, had already lost a week’s pay, and Grimm and Barton both weren’t doing too well, either. Logan and Steve were still in pretty strong.

After an hour’s worth of play, Bucky finally had enough and decided to keep what little pride he had. Janet decided to call it quits as well when she received word that she had a vid from her three-year-old daughter waiting for her in her quarters.

North had a tech problem to see to as well, so it just left Barton, Grimm, Logan and Steve.

Grimm had gone through at least a dozen cigars, and Barton was silently cursing in ways that would have inmates blushing.

Finally it came down to just Logan and Steve.

Logan smiled over his cards. “Looks like I’ll be getting that new Harley pretty soon after all.”

“Keep talking pal, as usual when it comes down to it, the Canadians just sit around drinking while an American gets it done.” Steve grinned back at him.

“Them’s fighting words in my country, Rogers, lucky for you we ain’t in my country.”

Logan pushed forward his entire stack of plats. “Put up or shut up, Boy Scout.”

Steve matched him.

“Alright boys, time to show.” Barton said.

Logan dropped down three aces; he had only been bluffing a little.

Steve only sat there a minute and then looked over at Barton. “You remember Rebecca Romijn Stamos?”

Barton crunched his eyebrows together. “What the fuck does that have to do with poker?”

“I do,” Grimm said. “Real pretty thing, was an actress or something back in the 21st.”

“She was married, right?” Steve asked.

“Yea, some guy on an old TV show.”

“Oh, yeah” Steve said and dropped his cards. “It was Full House, right?”

Logan’s cigar hung from his mouth.

Grimm howled with laughter. “Booya, BUB!”

Barton shook his head. “That was the lamest shit I have ever heard, Captain.”

Steve laughed and pulled the plats into a rather large pile.

Logan looked down and sure enough.

Aces over eights.

“Well, Hoorah,” he said, and conceded his utter defeat. “That means you’re buying the next few rounds, Rogers.”

“Later,” he said gathering up his winnings. ‘Time to polish the brass.”

Logan rose from his chair and put out his cigar. “Think I’d rather lose more money.”

As Logan started to walk away he took a notice of the cards.

Aces and eights.

Damn, that sounded familiar.

And for some reason, in the pit of his stomach he felt that dark feeling return to him.

He couldn’t place it, though.

As they walked out Grimm shouted to them “Enjoy getting rustled by the brass, cowboy.”

And all of a sudden it clicked.

Logan remembered.

“Nah, that’s bullshit,” he whispered to himself and decided to just forget about it.

They were only card, not some great omen of bad fortune.

But still he couldn’t shake that bad feeling.

He remembered the story of a lawman way back in early Earth American history that had that same hand. He was a real bad ass from what the stories say, hard and as tough as they come.

But getting shot in the back of the head can change all that.

He had been playing poker at that time and had won a game with a full house, too.

Aces and eights.

After that, they started calling it The Dead Man’s hand.

“Whiskey…..leave the bottle”

The look in Logan’s eyes made the bartender not ask any questions. He bent down and brought up a bottle of the Den’s home brewed liquor and sat it on the counter top.. As he went to remove the containment lid , Logan snatched the bottle away, extended one claw and sliced it off himself. He never missed a beat as he began pouring the strong liquid down his throat.

The bartender looked at him with a puzzled and slightly disturbed face

Logan noticed the look as he drank, he lowered the bottle just enough to speak “What you want a tip?…don’t piss in the wind.. Fuck off”

The bartender nodded quickly and proceeded to do just that.

The bottle was almost empty by the time he lowered it. A warm feeling was sweeping into his blood but it began to fade as quickly as it came

Damn Healing factor

“Why the hell couldn’t I get caught in a gamma wave or get bitten by a radioactive……tick or some such shit….least then maybe I could at least hold a damn buzz ” He whispered to himself and finished the bottle

Logan sighed and ran a hand down his face and let out a slow breath

The Nurachni

Dammit all to hell

It had been so long since the cease fire

So long since Humanities’ fight to stay alive had ended with withdraw of those monsters to the deepest recess of Dark Space

So long since memories of a past he never cared to think about again had crushed him in a tidal wave of emotions

Anna was feeling a lot of the same as well

The poor girl was shaken to the core at first…she remembers those days as well as any soldier who served on the front line. Anna lived on one of the border colonies ……hers was one of the first to be taken by the Nurachni…..she had lost everything and everyone she had ever know in in the time span of just a few moments. She had survived though……stayed hidden and quiet even as she saw the faces of her family and friends being dragged away by the drones for resource processing. Logan never knew exactly how long she had waited there….he only knew that if not for that Xavier corporation…….some mercy me relief group….she could still be there for all he knew….dirty scared and alone hidden under a few sheets of synth sheet.

Logan had stayed with her until she fell asleep after seeing the broadcast . He carried her to his room and covered her up before heading to the Wreck room. What hunters were left on the station all seemed to be transfixed upon the vid broadcast. Logan wasn’t paying attention, had no desire to know what was coming at the moment whatever it was though sure as hell wasn’t going to be good.

“turn it up some man” one hunter, Pymm, Logan guessed from the voice, shouted over to the bartender

The bartender fumbled with the control a moment before raising the volume on the vid monitor
“…..Federation Officials are investigating the reports now that this was not a attack of the Nurachni High Order. Intelligence is sketchy official word from Federal authorities sates that The High Order has contacted and made it clear that they are not responsible for this gruesome attack on the Border world colonies” She turned to listen to a com unit in her ear “Wait what?” she listened closer “Yes we go now to Admiral Thaddius Ross of Fleet High Command with confirmation”

The name caught Logan’s attention

That old son of a bitch was still kicking after all this time. He couldn’t help but smile a bit even in spite of all that was going on. Retirement was never a option for Ross…and if anyone ever tried to give him a a nice cushy desk to warm his ass with….Ross would probably commandeer the biggest carrier in the Federation fleet suck back a couple dozen bottles of whiskey and high tail it for parts unknown.

Logan looked at the vid screen, Ross still looked the same. The uniform was neat and trim but not to the point of being obsessive, Ross had enough grunt in him still to not let all the brass he wore push it out of him.

That fucking mustache though

Yosemite Sam would be jealous of that damn thing

“We have received word from Enkindler Ralhalos of Nurachni High Order” Ross started, if their was one man who smoked as many cigars in this universe as Logan did, it had to be Ross form the sound of his voice “An apology and plea was made to Federation Command that they are not responsible for the attack on the colony”

“Bullshit!” a hunter yelled at the top of his lungs to the screen

“Will you shut your trap” another said just as loud

“The Enkindler has stated that the responsible party is an renegade faction of the Nurachni Caste…a group that splintered form the Order some time ago for their refusal of giving up the old zealot beliefs of the High Order. The Enkindler has assured me personally that all efforts will be made to help Federal offices in the capture of this group”

Questions started to get shouted at Ross form various reporters but he held his hand high “The Enkindler along with several other members of the High Order including War-Bringer Zentralhok have asked for permission for a council meeting with Federal Command…I myself will be attending within the next few hours upon the very ground which was scorched but a short time ago”

“Admiral” a reporter stood with hand raised “Are officials really believing this farce of a white flag?”

Ross’s eyes narrowed “If they didn’t I would already be in a Battle Carrier locked and loaded”

With the whiskey. Logan thought

“Is the High Order going to contribute Agents to aid officials? “ Another reporter asked “Will Humans be working side by side with the Nurachni?”

“I am not at liberty to disclose any details at this time”

“Admiral is it true that the daughter of Ambassador Lee was taken?”

Ross stiffened “Again I have very little details of the casualty lists….when we know more you will know more”
More and more questions were fired upon him. Ross wrinkled his nose in disgust and pulled the small mic form his vest and whispered harshly “Interview is done….I have work to do”

The vid switched back to the broadcast room with grim faces hanging upon the reporters there “We will keep you up to date on any new information found”

Logan turned away from the vid and shook his head sourly. Ross was actually going to go meet with those cyber organic pieces of filth

Nurachni being diplomatic?

Those words went together like Wilson an sanity

At that very thought Wilson plopped down upon a stool beside Logan

“haven’t been here in a while wonder if they have Appletinies like I asked for”

Logan sighed “What do you want Wilson?”

Wade slapped a arm around Logan’s shoulder “Checked on Anna, she was crying in her sleep…thought it best to not disturb her” he thought a moment “Even though the urge to try out my new fog horn almost prevailed the time didn’t feel right, so I left her be and thought maybe you could use some cheering up”

Logan looked over at Wade “You know what Wilson your right….and you are just the person that could make me happy”

Wade smiled so broadly underneath his mask he was sure he would have another record for most teeth shown in a single grin to go along with his long list of armpit musical records “Name it my brother and The Pool will see it done”

Logan smile and pointed at Wade “You” he motioned toward the air lock hatch “Space” he brought a hand to Wade throat and started squeezing “Choking”

The smile was a bit strained now but Wade held it as best he could and squeaked out a few words “You’re a hard man to please Wolvie…..uh…..uhhh…..ya…kn…ow…..I …have..this…habit …of needing….to…breathe”

Logan begrudgingly let go…as fun as it would be to see swell up like a hot air balloon in the expanse of space….and even more fun to play pin the tail on the Wade with the Canuk;’s turbo guns….he wasn’t mad at Wilson, and even in his own annoying squeaking gravel through a gasoline tank way….he was trying to help

Wade rubbed at his throat “Wow……so when you have your “Private me only special fun fun time”…..do you treat little Wolvie that way??”

“Wilson” The threat of the Air lock was evident in Logan’s tone

“Never mind” Wade said happily and turned to the bartender “Hey buddy….give mea…hmmm….Slow comfortable screw against the wall….with a twist”

The bartender looked flabbergasted

Wade waved his hands quickly “No No No…The drink “

The bartender breathed a loud sigh of relief
Wade quirked an eyebrow “And what’s that supposed to mean??”

The bartender shook his head quickly as he brought the drink over

“Stuck up” Wade said as he beg inputting a healthy amount of tiny umbrellas which he oddly enough kept in one of his ammo pouches into the brightly colored drink

Logan was about to stand and leave when he caught a scent coming form the lift…He sighed again knowing that this day was just getting better by the minute

Soft yet strong hands touched him upon his coated shoulder and that honey sweet voice purred into his ear “Buy a girl a drink?”

Ororo sat down beside him and smiled

Logan lowered his head into his hands

Wade perked up upon seeing Storm sit “Well good evening” he sat straight up and smirked behind his mask “Might I interest you in a slow comfortable screw against the wall with a twist?” he pointed at her and made a clicking noise “And a drink as well”

“She would grind you into a little bug Wilson” Logan said from the cover of his hands

Wade laughed nonchalantly “You don’t know Wade Wilson he is one tough little insect”

“Aiiiiir Loooooock”

“Gotcha” Wade picked up his drink and moved away, still keeping his attention on what was being said between them however

Logan slowly peeked out form under his hands and saw that brilliant smile, he groaned again and sank back down into the foxhole that was his hands

“Hey groundhog” She knocked gently on the side of his head “Want to come up for just a minute we need to talk”

“Sorry” Logan said “Saw my shadow going to be here for at least six more weeks”

“This is business related”

Logan peeked a single eye out “And what in the name of Odin’s blue tinted tucas would be business that you and I would have”

“Federal communication came in to the guild “She said rubbing a finger up and down the counter of the bar “Forge just got it in through the wire…apparently they were trying to get you as well but your receptionist appears to have taken the day off”

“Watch your mouth Storm…that kid has had it rough ever since” he waved to the vid monitor “She needs a minute”

“Kind of related to why I am here” Ororo went on dismissing Anna’s state “The Feds want to see us”

Logan lifted his head and his eyebrow was arched the highest it had ever been

“The Feds have a bounty for us” She smiled sweetly “And trust me the money is good”
Logan had a mixture of horror and shock plastered over his features

He sat that way for quite some time never answering

Storm’s own eyebrows raised and she waved a hand in front of his face “You there….?”
She lightly taped him on the check “Did you hear what I said…We have the job to end all jobs. They want to see the both of us and our teams as soon as possible….and like I said the money is good…damn good”

Logan still sat there with that perplexed look

Ororo sighed “Say something for Pete’s sake”

Logan tried to find the words but nothing seemed to quite match the way he felt. Logan had been around a long time , he knew just about every swear word in almost any language, pretty sure he had even invented a few. None of them however seemed to be good enough.

So in a last act of desperation he reached the word that he knew he would regret yelling before it was all over but it had to be done

“WILSOOOON”

Storm covered her now ringing ears and rubbed them gently

A loud crash and the patter of combat boots accompanied a hard breathing Wade Wilson “You rang sir?” he said in a faux British accent

Logan reached up and grabbed Wilson around the neck with one arm and pulled him close “GET….ANNA!”

Wade made a strained nod “Right away my lord” The accent he spoke with still held strong. He ran to the lift at full speed

Logan followed closely behind…even the fear of sharing a lift with Wilson had become moot

Ororo watched after him with annoyance “LOGAN!!….did you not hear a word I said….” She held her hands out “Job…..work……MONEY!”

Logan held the doors open , turned and bent over “ELEPHANTS…..FLYING…..OUT….ASS….FIRST” he stood back up with an exasperated look breathing harshly as the lift doors closed

Storm shook her head and smiled . She waved the bartender over and ordered a drink as she pulled a ice cube form the glass and sucked the booze form it she whispered “Better call air traffic control and get eh Vaseline handy Sweetheart….because the elephants are about to take flight”

Wade had always known people thought him to be a bit….eccentric shall we say?

That one therapist had described it as “Crazy as a rat in a hot tin shit house”

Eh what did he know anyway

Wade always just thought that he saw the things other people ignored and it allowed him to view the new and wonderful threads in the tapestry of life

Bea Arthur for example

That thought was all that was giving him comfort at the moment as he was being dragged along by a quite irate Wolverine. The force of the constricting forearm around his neck , while shutting off some of his air supply no doubt. did however make it easier to imagine the powerful muscles there belonging to his Golden girl goddess Bea

“Uh….Logan!” he squeaked out with much effort “Uh…..look I know we need partner time but….may I resume respiration please?”

Logan’s face was a visage of wide eyed determination that made no movement other than the occasional twitch of an eye and throb of obviously strained forehead vein. He pulled Wade harder along as hurried down the Den’s corridors

Wade whimpered at the increased pace and could only try to match him step for step

After a few moments Logan reached Anna’s door and hit the buzzer rapidly again and again

The barrage of button pressing went on for a few seconds before Anna finally answered the door. She was wearing baggy shirt and pants and her hair was a bit unkempt. Her face was stained with trails of the tears she had been crying in her sleep

“Jeeze….what the hell….Logan?…..Wade?” Her eyebrows arched toward the ceiling and her mouth hung a bit ajar

Wade waved and adjusted his neck as best he could to allow him to speak better “Hey Anna…look “ he pointed to Logan “We’re bonding”

“Uh huh” She nodded slowly and moved aside “Come in…I guess” she knew that look Logan was wearing…..she could feel a headache coming on

Logan dragged Wade inside and stopped in the middle of the apartment. He spun around bringing a flailing Wade along with him. The muscles in his neck were clenched so tightly it was amazing he was able to speak “ANNA…..TROUBLE!”

She nodded slowly ignoring Wade’s gestured pleas for release “I know Logan…..but maybe its not as bad as we think. If the Federation and the High Order are actually having a conference then maybe what the news vids are saying is true. Maybe it wont be the way it was”

Logan growled and tensed up causing another muffled cry of pain to escape form Wade’s throat “NOT THAT!” He slowed himself a moment and took a few deep breathes “Federation…wants…to see us” he almost got sick just saying that

Anna looked confused but walked over to her desk and fetched her Omni tool. A handheld device that acted as logbook, computer, and scheduler. She turned it on and her eyes went wide as a new message appeared on the small screen. “This is from Federal High Command Logan” she looked up at him “They want us for a job”

Wade raised a fist in the air “Yaaaay” he managed to rasp out

Logan gave him a hard squeeze that turned the cheer into a pain filled groan

“No way Anna….not in this life not in the next life not in any fucking life” he said slowly

Anna was reading the finer points of the summons. She made a face at the last line “If we don’t appear Logan it says we will have our permits stripped and be brought up on charges of failing to aid the Federation in times of need” she sighed “We have no choice”

Mount St. Helens would look upon Logan with envy at this point. The corners of his mouth were drawn back into a hard quivering sneer, his teeth grinded against one another in a loud chorus . The eyes in his head were bulging as greatly as the muscles through out his body

“Uh Logan….I think your killing Wade” Anna said after seeing Wade pulling desperately on Logan’s coat

Anna reached up and touched Logan’s cheek with a gloved hand “its ok sugah its ok calm…calm”

Logan’s face showed no measure of restraint but his arms relaxed enough for Wade to be released

“Thank Gooooood” he said in a high pitch before falling away to the floor

“They are not taking away my license Anna” Logan growled “And I sure as hell am not going back to those bastards now that they see their tails are back in the fire”

“We work for the federation all the time Logan this is no different..”

“YES IT IS” Logan shouted harshly cutting her off “They court martial me for dealing with those sons of bitches the way they should have been dealt with and now that they are back they want me again ?”

Logan threw his hands up and shook his head

“Not to mention….I’m apparently not the only one they need” He said hinting

“Her too?” Anna asked

Logan nodded slowly “Oh yea”

Anna rubbed her chin a moment “Something has to be up…..asking for the only Weapon class soldier left in the galaxy and for the former top infiltration specialist in Federation SpecOps”

“And me right?” Wade asked with a hand raised toward the ceiling as he still lay spread out upon the floor

“I have another five years on my back Anna” Logan said “And then I’m finding me a nice quiet little place with a creek I’m going to drain and fill with beer and I am officially retired…I’m not letting these pricks say how I’m going to spend the rest of my life”

Anna fixed him with a serious stare “Its either this Logan….or we all end up on Zorn Penal Colony”

Logan ran a hand down his face and cursed

“they gave us a number by the way” she quipped in

Logan scoffed

“Ten million platinum”

Logan felt as if he had just been punched in the crotch by the golden goose .

He peeked out form under his hand

Wade even managed to crawl to his feet “Hang on” he lifted his face mask and rubbed a finger inside of his ears “Ok now was that ten…MILLION?”

Logan looked distrustful “Split what way?”

Anna reread to make sure “apiece”

Wade waved his hands about “Wait wait wait wait wait “ he extended all of his fingers “TEN….not one…not two…three four five six seven eight or nine” he pushed his hands an inch form Anna’s face “TEN…APIECE”

She held her Omni tool aloft to show them

Wade scanned over the paragraphs. Their was no listing of what the job was…..but in written in black and white was the order of compensation upon completion

“…All involved parties will be owed the sum of ten million platinum or twenty million Federation credits per surviving individual”

Wade felt as if he had stolen Bill Gates pants and the guy had left his wallet in them

Logan walked up beside him and read it as well “Now what the hell kind of job pays that kind of money?”

Anna shrugged “One way to find out”

Hawking Beta Star Cluster
Dreadnaught class Carrier 233 Thanos

“Are you SURE they wanted him too?” Logan asked jabbing a finger in Wade’s direction

Anna nodded as the ship was brought into the dock of the giant Carrier “All of us Logan” she said undoing the straps of her chair “Don’t forget…Wade is good at a few things”

Wade was not paying any attention to what they were saying as his mind danced about in Wilson Land.. He was currently compiling his newest shopping list , the details of it are probably best not to go into since the number one is a life size singing droid of William Shatner performing his greatest hits.

Logan shook his head “Might as well forget about any kind of stealth if were bringing Wile Coyote here with us”

Wade ignored him and only continued compiling his wish list as the three of them exited the Canuk.

The Carrier’s hanger was enormous

Fighters lined from one side to the other

Several Ground Troop Transports rested on the far side of the corner


Logan noted that Techs were busy making preparations to the lot of them. He assumed they were preparing for the worst should the need arise

A small group of men were standing at the hanger lift

Logan groaned loudly when he saw Summers was one of them

The Captain stood there prim and proper as ever. You would be hard pressed to find a wrinkle in that spotless uniform he wore. The creases were all just so, his brass polished to a high shine, even that ruby quartz visor seemed to sparkle

Scott Summers stood tall and straight every bit the poster boy of the Federation

Logan had to wonder though how the guy managed to sit down with that exceptionally large stick that had to be planted firmly in his ass

Summers had a grim look about him as they approached

He cleared his throat loudly

“Ms. Raven” he said to Anna with a polite nod of the head

Anna returned the nod

“Mr.Wilso….” He didn’t manage to finish before Wade had forcefully taken his hand and shook it vigorously

“Hey how ya doing?…so who do we kill and where’s the money??”

Anna regretted letting him into the stash of energy drinks at this point

Summers face attempted to maintain its composure “We will get to that in time Mr. Wilson” he pulled his hand free and turned to Logan

“Howlett”

“Douche bag”

Anna elbowed him in the side

Logan cast a irritated glance at her for a moment and then back to Summers “Captain Douche bag”

Summers slowly shook his head “if you would all follow me please”

Anna gave Logan a exasperated stare to which he threw his hands up and scoffed dismissively

The stayed close behind the entourage of soldiers as they walked briskly down the hallway towards the lift

Logan leaned against the side as it took the up several levels. He rubbed the bridge of his nose and sighed loudly

What the fuck am I doing here??

He looked up at Soldier boy Summers and shook his head then to Anna who seemed to be as uncomfortable as he was. His gaze then fell upon Wilson’s grinning visage and he made a defeated groan and his face planted down into his hand.

Ten Million Logan…ten million…..retirement….a nice quiet little homestead….

He was trying desperately to convince himself

Beer…just think of the beer…real beer…all you can ever drink…no more Wilson…hey that’s a good thing…

“Hey!” Wade shouted all of a sudden “Can I get one of those Armored Exo Infantry mech suits as a down payment for this?” He asked Scott in all seriousness “One with the double flamer units ..and oh the big bore shell casers….and OH do they come with an eight track??”

Scott had no words to respond and was thankful the lift doors had opened and hurried out “This way please” he said trying to ignore Wade’s continued questions

“Hey after this is over how about I come get the federation some weapon building tips I have this great idea for a multi phase laser and disco balls”

Logan didn’t not move for a moment his face still firmly in his hands repeating his mantra in a slightly desperate voice “The beer…the beer…the beer…the beer”

Anna pulled him along the hallway until they reached the CIC.

Several officers stood bent over briefing tables then stood to attention as the Captain came on deck

Storm stood in all of her long legged glory against a chair talking to a tall dark haired man. Forge was on her side smiling and commenting

She paused long enough to blow Logan a kiss

He rolled his eyes and walked over to a seat where one of the ship navigators was going over charts

The young man looked up and swallowed loudly “C-C-Captain Howlett” he began sputtering “Sir…it is truly an honor…

Logan waved his hands aggravated “Save it kid I just need a seat”

“W-w-well Sir I …I really need to get this star charts in order. Its for your assignment….” he smiled nervously “I must confess sir…meeting with you is a honor I never thought I would have” He brought his hand up in a sincere salute

Logan growled “Kid…if you want to see that pension of yours one day drop the hand and move the ass form the seat”

The young man gulped and began moving his charts off “Y-y-yes sir. Sorry sir”

“Cut the sir shit kid” Logan said and plopped down heavily into the chair “I work for a fucking living….and I aint no Captain anymore” he said bitterly

The boy, embarrassed turned away and stumbled in his nervousness to the other side of the CIC

Storm left the side of the officer and Forge and sauntered over to him. The black sheen of her light tactical armor shimmered and was as form fitting as armor could get.

“I see you are all smiles as usual”

“Yea I’m just shits and giggles” Logan said wearily

“Just think of the money sweetheart” she moved around to his back and placed her hands upon his shoulders.

Logan swore he could feel the warmness of her fingers even though his coat and heavy armor

“And is it really so bad to be working together again?” She breathed into his ear in a whisper that made the muscles in his neck tighten to the point of quiver

“Would rather be rectally relieved by a syphilitic bear” Logan forced himself to say through ground teeth hoping it didn’t sound as shaky to her as it did in his own ears.

“You always were kinky” she breathed into his other ear and ran her fingers across his neck before lightly tapping his shoulder with the side of her hip as she walked back towards a obviously curious Forge

Logan felt his head bob matching her movements as she walked away before he realized he was. He growled and slapped a palm to his face and slid it down quickly

Yea..sure flirty flirty at the start…she gets ya thinking with the wrong head and next thing ya know your somehow some way getting screwed in all the wrong ways

Logan steeled himself. This was his last big send off before retirement city then no more hunts, no more Federation. No more Storm…no more Wilson

“She could start a stage act with hypnotism with that” Wade pointed out his head level with Logan’s watching Ororro walk away

Logan growled softly in irritation but he had to admit for once that Wilson had a point as he vacantly found his eyes back to the gently swaying of those hips…the way the armor stopped just at the small of her back and the leather lining wrapped just so around the curves of her…

“SHUT THE HELL UP!!” Logan shouted to himself which left the whole room staring at him wide eyed

He looked around exasperated and secretly a bit embarrassed “Uh…..Wilson…..shut up Wilson”

Wade tsked and walked away “Must have touched a nerve” he said to Anna as he went to stand by her . He brought his hand up and whispered none to softly “Probably one that hasn’t been touched in a while” He chuckled “Know what I mean” he elbowed her playfully

“Oh Shut the hell up Wade” she sighed

Wade sadly shook his head “Sure…I am the one with the emotional problems of the group”

“Officer s on the deck” came the call and every soldier snapped to attention as two men entered

Logan caught their scent right away. He knew both…and one he had hoped to never smell again

Thaddeus Ross and Anthony Stark came in and went straight to Summers

Logan’s eyes narrowed at seeing Stark
The bastard looked as though he hadn’t aged a day

The same could be said for Logan but their was a reason for that

As many lives as that piece of crap threw away and he still looks as prim and pretty as ever

Logan’s hands became tight fists and the urge to storm out climb back aboard his ship and leave was stronger than ever

Ross noticed him out of the corner of his eye and stepped toward him “Look at the sad bastard state of you Howlett”

Logan looked up at him “Don’t be jealous I still got all my hair Ross”

The Admiral brought a pair of cigars out and handed one to him “Yea the way you grow it you could make a killing in the rug industry boy”

Logan took the cigar and produced a small flame form his coat pocket and lit the end “Mind the boy shit Ross”

Thunderbolt weakly smiled as he lit his own smoke “Yea and you will still be around kicking even after im long dead and buried where is the fucking justice in this universe?”

Logan took a deep drag “If you fucks don’t get me killed first” he cast another glance at Stark

Ross followed the look “You still have a bug up your ass about him?”

“Are you fucking serious??” Logan couldn’t believe he was being asked that by Ross of all people “You know what happened”

Ross blew out a plume of smoke “I believe it ended with him having four teeth knocked out and his jaw wired shut”

“Should have killed him” Logan said taking another pull of the cigar and blowing the smoke toward the floor

“That mission was FUBAR before it even started Logan we all knew that…but it got the war won and that’s what we do …we end wars” Ross said adamantly

“Regardless of what it costs huh?” Logan asked bitterly

“Soldiers die Logan…you know that I know that its been fifteen years build a bridge and get the fuck over it” Ross crossed his arms

Logan chuckled snidely “You never change Admiral”

“And more is the pity you don’t either”

Logan met his old commanders’ gaze “I wont work for him Ross….I don’t care how much fucking money you pay me”

“This is my show Logan” Ross said firmly “You are working for me and the Federation”

Logan twirled a finger in the air “Yaaaay” he crushed the cigar under his boot “What do you want with me Ross….doesn’t the federation have enough muscle bound soldiers just itching to prove how big their dicks are?”

“This I know you have never gotten over the last mission Logan” Ross started “Your last dealings with the Nurachni were the same as all of ours…bad” Ross extinguished his own cigar “You fought them you beat them and help drive them off and lost everything in the end result”

“Your doing a hell of a job with that bridge building Ross”

“Maybe I can help you with something else” Ross took a file from a nearby table and handed it to him

Logan took it and opened it

The picture of a young girl was staring at him

“And this is?” he asked

“That is your target…daughter of Ambassador Lee…Name is Jubilation Carter Lee…she is your redemption Logan”

Logan looked at him hard “They took her?” Why?”

Ross shrugged “Don’t think they even know they have the rep of the Border worlds daughter…They just see her as more resources to chop up”

Logan looked at the picture again

Kid did not look a day older than fourteen

“You sure she is alive?”

“The Enkindler has assured us that these Zealots are collecting as much recourses as they can before refinement…they want the war machine running again”

Logan gritted his teeth

A damn kid

“In and out that’s it?

Ross nodded “That’s it”

Logan breathed out slowly “Not that I want any fucking Federal redemption here Ross….but what did you mean by that?”

Ross smiled

An actual genuine Thaddeus Ross smile

“Her mother is Carol Danvers”

Logan sat with Wade in the Carrier lounge trying to make sense of the information he had recently been given. A monumental task with his on again off again partner in attendance

“You know I can hear you right???”

(……….)

“Yea you I’m talking to you wise guy”

(Wade what are you doing??)

“I think its well past time for the spot light to shine upon the Pool don’t you??”

(Now??)

“Oh yea”

(Jeeze)

“Wolvie take a hike its time for me to save this flusker cluck of a story”

(I knew I would regret this)

“Give me my introduction buddy boy!!!!”




The following is a paid for (and by paid for I mean forced at gun point ) Announcement by Mr. Wade Wilson esquire

And now I present to you The Man of the hour , The Tower of Power, Too sweet to be sour WAAAAAADE WILSOOON

………..?

(that’s your cue jackass)

Wade pokes his head from behind the curtains “Hey we had a deal, I don’t call Marvel about this little side job I do for you and you give me the introduction I deserve”

(…….I am not saying that Wade)

Wade pulls a cell phone form his belt “Stan the man is on speed dial pally”

(…….I hate you)

Ladies and Gentleman I present to you…Wade Wilson the Deodorant of Sexy…strong enough for a man but made for a woman

Wade leaps form the curtains and takes several bows in all directions

“Thank you Thank you please no your too much…hey who threw those panties? Just kidding I love all of ya”

“I guess ill start with some of my personal history to get warmed up. I was born at a young age ladies and gentlemen. It is hinted that the writer of this particular “story” and I are related being as his mother and my mother are both mothers and apparently we went to the same high school together at different times. I never had any brothers and sisters so I had to play with myself a lot”

(Ok Wade hold it no one wants to hear that)

“I think some would enjoy my life history good sir”

(I know its a hard thing for you Wade but PLEASE focus)

“Fine……coughdouchecough..Ok I know what all of you are thinking. Gee Wade why did I ever even bother to read this story? I mean sure ya got a hot babe like Storm but really who wants to even remotely think of her doing the dirty humpty hump love pump with Logan? Am I right?”

(That’s exactly why people come to this side Wade)

“I’m not following”

(it’s a shipping site Wade….where people can make their own stories featuring their favorite couples form different mediums. This one is for Logan and Ororro)

“then what in Zeus’s butt pucker am I doing here?”

(your part of this story Wade…thought you might be a good fit…and since your series got cancelled thought you could use the work)

“Well gosh darn there Bro’ham why not just give me a nice paper cut and squirt lemon juice in it”

(Sorry)

“Jerk”

(May we just please continue?)

“Do I get to sleep with Storm at any point in this story?”

(No)

“What about Rogue…I see her checking me out I know she wants to dive into the deep side of the Pool…ya get what I’m saying there hint hint nudge nudge?”

(Keep this up Wade and I will set you in a intimate moment with Thunderbolt Ross)

“…..Sam Elliot “Ross” or William Hurt “Ross?”

(……It makes a difference?)

“Dude…two words…Road….House”

(I hated that movie)

Gun cocking sound

(I mean….I hated that movie …uh never got a sequel)

“it did…now there was a movie that was a real freak of nature …it sucked and blowed all at the same time”

Rim shot

(…….)

“It had none of the Shirtless Swayze Flavor”

“Any who. Ladies and Germs I am just popping in to give my two cents on this little fan made Fic that this guy is sprouting off……mainly because he has such a fat case of writers block . I mean its soooo fat….”

“…………”

“hey help me out here”

(Sigh)

(How fat is it?)

“Its sooooo fat that Jabba the Hutt says Daaaaayum”

(……..That’s the best you can come up with??)

“Hey you’re the one who feeds me the material”

“I mean come on ya put in more pop culture references than then one of those Not Another movies. I mean its like were on a episode of Family guy here……….Dammit YOU SEE!!!!…your killing me”

(Trying the best I can here…)

“No try….DO….or do not..there is no try.”

(……….)

“See what I did there?”

(Just get on with it Wade)

“As I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, apparently The gang and I are on our way toward some planet to rescue some obscure character from the Marvel pantheon that hasn’t seen the spotlight in the past decade. I mean seriously Adam West gets more gigs than this kid”

(Don’t be mean Wade)

“Truth hurts. So this kid gets captured by these…….what the hell????……How do you even pronounce this??”

“No-roach-knee??”

(Nurcarchni)

“Well hey thanks Rosetta Stone that helps a lot since technically I’m not hearing you pronounce the name I am having to read it just like your long suffering audience “

(This version of you is in my head Wade you know what I know)

“And oh do I wish I could block out some of THOSE things”

(Get on with it Wade)

“You know some of those memories would make GREAT blackmail material”

(Wade!)

“I mean that night at that strip club after that tenth shot of jagermeister …”

(STOP RIGHT THERE!!!)

“I mean the ladies who work at the establishment are the ones who are supposed to wear the high heels and the pasties”

(I WILL FRIKKIN KILL YOU!!)

“Wouldn’t that be a form of suicide??”

(Nothing I would miss trust me)

“Funny part is ladies and gentlemen is that he is actually getting pissed off”

(………)

“Strike a pose. Deadpool-1...Ogrenuts -0”

(Ogrenaught…NAUGHT NAUGHT !!

“I like my version better”

(BACK TO THE DAMN STORY DISCCUSION WADE!!!!)

Whispers “Someboooooodies crrrrrranky”

(I so rarely get to write anymore and what do I choose to do with the time I have???….I spend it with YOU)

“I am always with ya buddy….Cue the music “

(NO DON’T!!!!!)

Ahem “YOUUUUUR NEAAAAR…THERES NOOOOTHING I FEEEEAR….YOU ARE SAAAAFE IN MY HEART AND MY HEART WILL GOOOOOO ON AND OOOOOON!!!”

(That’s it we are done professionally)

“Who are you supposed to be ?Christian Bale?”

(Groan)

“Speaking of which I never got my Deadarangs like you promised”

(Yea hold your breath for that)

“And my Deadmobile”

(Back to the subconscious with you Wade)

“Speaking of which could you clean that place up some?? Do you know how much useless crap is floating around inside the melon of yours? I mean who the hell needs to know the Doth ‘raki language?”

(Hey you know Klingon)

“I have you know that it is the fastest growing language on the planet buddy boy”

(Whatever. Say goodbye Wade)

“Hab SoSlI' Quch"

(That was just mean)

“That’s how I roll”

(Trust me everybody this will NEVER happen again)

“So he thinks …..MWHAHAHAHA!!!….MWHAHAHA…COUGH!…cough”

(Idiot)

“Loser”

( Great lakes Avenger)

“Jeph Loeb fan boy”

(I hate you )

“You love me”