Chapter 5

He must be getting soft. At least that’s what he attributed the nervousness that assailed him to, as he waited under the willow tree for Ororo to grace him with her presence. If anyone was to see him now, they would think he was a virgin waiting for his wedding night. He needed to get a grip on his emotions. Hell, he was the fucking Wolverine, not a silly young lad fresh out of the schoolroom. Today was the day he had decided to reveal all to Ororo. They were well into the second week of summer and he didn’t want to waste any more time. He wasn’t a man for grandstanding, so he took into account Charles’ advice to keep it simple and opted to ask her to explore the mansion grounds him, knowing her love of nature will make her acquiesce to his request. Then, he would knowingly lead her on the three mile path that will take her to her new home. In addition to showing her the new residence, he was going to come clean about his feelings for her. Frankly, he didn’t care for being just her friend anymore. He wanted more, needed more, and craved more from her. He wasn’t a religious man in any way, but he found himself praying quite fervently that all went well today. His future for love, happiness and a family of his own hanged in the balance. He didn’t even want to think about her rejection of all he had to offer her this day. He honestly had no clue as to what he would do should she refuse him.

He straightened when he sensed her approaching. He looked up and took stock of her regal beautiful form as her feet touch the ground in front of him. She gave him a slow, disarming smile. His chest immediately tightened with his love and desire for her.

In lieu of a greeting, she said, “Thank you for suggesting this, Logan. A hike through the woods is exactly what I need.”

He stared at her and offered something akin to a smile. “No problem, ‘Ro. I was feelin’ antsy stayin’ inside today.”

Ororo became lost in his dark eyes. Their heat seemed to swirl around her, warming her body, making her yearn. She loved just about everything about him. She longed to trace the creases and lines in his face with her fingertips. But she roused herself out of her daze. “Shall we be on our way?”

Logan indicated with a sweep of his hand for her to lead. He silently admired the gentle sway of her hips in the distressed cutoff jeans as she began walking. They engaged each other in conversation, talking about everything and nothing. They talked about her trip to Africa in more depth.

“It was wonderful. I forgot how beautiful my homeland is.”

“I like Victoria Falls. But there is one unique treasure from Africa that I will always admire,” he replied, mysteriously.

Unaware that said unique treasure was her, Ororo turned to him. She raised her perfectly sculpted eyebrows in inquiry. “Are you going to tell me what this unique treasure is?”

He didn’t answer her for a few long seconds, the only part of him that moved was his eyes. They leveled her, filling her with little bursts of sensations from her head to the tips of her toes. “In due time.”

As they continued walking, they pointed out various species of flora and fauna to each other, enjoying each other’s company, all the while both trying to rein in their feelings that threatened to erupt at any given moment.

Ororo was trying her damnedest not to cave and reveal her feelings to him. But damn if deep in her body, butterflies weren’t dancing. She did her best to remain downwind as she was positive her desire for him was permeating the air.

Logan felt his beast clawing to get to the surface, eager to claim its mate, especially when he got whiff of something that can only be identified as arousal. Hell, her powerful scent didn’t help matters much either. He watched her carefully as he’s been doing since she joined him. She appeared relaxed today. Dare he hope she wanted him too? Dare he hope that he had something to do with her tranquil disposition? He took out a cigar and lit it, hoping the addictive flavor of nicotine will clear his addled mind.

She didn’t care much for his smoking, but it was one of his vices she knew came with loving the man. She flicked her wrist and created a wind that carried the stench of the offending object away from her. He knew she hated his smoking, so he extinguished the cigar after taking a few more pulls.

“Sorry. I know ya don’t like my smoking.”

“I do not care for it. But it is part of what makes you who are,” she replied gently.

He loved when she said shit like that to him. It warmed his insides. Fuck, he needed to come clean with her now. Retaining his self-control was beginning to take its toll on his libido.

By his calculations, they were halfway through the path. He placed his hand on her back to halt her movements and immediately felt minor volts of electricity flow through him. She turned and was startled at his penetrating eyes. Her heart jumped and she blushed, as delicious warmth assembled in her feminine core.

“’Ro.” His usual gruff voice was laced with something else.

“Yes, Logan?”

“Why ya been so depressed lately?” He grimaced. Ya’re such a dumbass, his beast taunted. This wasn’t what he had intended to say. Fucking great. Now, she’ll feel as if he was attacking her.

Her gaze drifted away from him to look up into the sky. Long moments passed before she answered softly, “Was it that obvious?”

“Maybe not ta the others, but ta me.”

Ororo gazed at Logan. He was standing ramrod straight, a look of sympathy on his face. The censure she was expecting was absent. Should she reveal her thoughts to him? Of course, he was her friend, she loved him, albeit secretly and most importantly, she trusted him with her life. And who knows, maybe finally getting it out in the open will give her that sense of peace she desperately craved.

“Ya could trust me, ‘Ro.” His simple statement made the decision for her.

She took a deep breath and continued to walk along the path. She motioned for him to walk next to her. “You know I was amongst the very first students Charles brought to the mansion?”

He nodded in the affirmative.

“For twelve years I have dedicated myself and my life to Charles’ dream. During that time I put my hopes and dreams on the back burner.”

Logan remained silent, allowing her to talk. “My greatest desire in life is to have a family of my own, to find love. I thought I had it once, but it was not meant to be.”

He knew about Forge and what he did to her. He had promised himself that, if he ever got the chance, he would gut the spineless bastard.

“After Forge,” she continued, “I gave up on those desires. I buried them so deep, so that I would not be able to feel the pain that comes with having those desires go unfulfilled as time goes by.”

Logan felt her pain. It was the same for him. He had felt that way once, before he came to terms with his love for the vulnerable woman walking besides him.

She stopped walking and faced Logan. “Apparently, I did not bury them deep enough.”

“Wha’dya mean, ‘Ro?” He damned well knew what she meant, but he wanted to hear her say it.

She took a deep breath, and then continued. “Jean and Scott’s marriage and Remy and Rogue’s engagement have only served to showcase my shortcomings.”

“Ya don’t have any shortcomings.”

She gave him a small smile in appreciation. “The reason why I have been so sad lately is that I feel as if my window for love and marriage is closing. Everyone around me is doing what I have dreamt about doing for so long. Finding their soul mates and building lives together.”

While he was listening to her, he was simultaneously calculating the remaining distance to the house. If he was correct, there was roughly another mile remaining. As he didn’t reveal his true feelings to her as yet, he realized he wasn’t fully prepared to show her the house as yet. He needed to lay all his cards out on the table before they can both step into the future.

“There’s a pond a few feet away. Ya wanna go sit there fer a while?”

“Yes. That will be fine.” The little detour will give her a chance to calm her nerves and her racing heart. Her chest was continuously tightening on her. She needed to admit her love to the man before it killed her.

He led her to a fell tree near the pond. The view was absolutely breathtaking. He saw the joy that came over her face when she saw the stunning view. Score one for me, he thought.

“It is simply beautiful here, Logan. I completely forgot this was part of the mansion’s grounds. How did you ever find it?”

He was watching her closely. “Well darlin’. I’m always explorin’.”

“Thank you for bringing me here.”

“Ya like it?”

She turned to him and gave him that megawatt smile that always made his heart skip a beat. “Very much.”

“Look, ‘Ro,” he said, getting back to their previous conversation, “Ya can’t give up. All da things ya want and deserve could be yers. Ya have ta be willin’ to grab it when it comes yer way.”

“If it comes my way,” she mumbled.

Mysteriously, he replied, “When ya least expect it.”

Ororo turned to him. She raised an eyebrow in silent inquiry. “Oh? Is psychic ability one of your mutant powers we did not know about?”

Logan barked with laughter, frightening the few small animals that were around into scurrying away. “Can I ask ya somethin’, ‘Ro?”

“Sure.”

He took a deep breath. He needed to know if there was a minute chance for him with this living Goddess before him. Piercing her with his eyes, his question was slow and to the point. “Was Forge da only man ya’ve ever seen yerself havin’ it all wid?”

She was not prepared for his loaded question. Her eyes widened and a sob heaved in her chest. She got up from where she was sitting and turned away before he could see. She never expected this question from the very man she was in love with, hungered for a future with. She wasn’t strong enough to answer this direct line of questioning. By all means, she knew he was expecting an answer, but was she prepared for the repercussions of her reply? Should she lie or should she just stop running from her feelings and tell him the truth right here, right now. She was tired of running, of being lonely, of hiding behind her Goddess persona. She wanted her desires fulfilled and the only one to bring about that fulfillment was the man waiting for her answer.

She turned around and raised teary eyes to him. “No.”





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