Logan stalked slowly into the room and stared at her. She was looking away, looking down at the white sterile sheets that covered her legs that refused to stop trembling. She refused to meet his gaze; there was no way that she was going to do it. She did not want to look into those eyes of his because she knew that just a glimpse would pierce her heart. She had no idea what to expect if she did decide to give him the satisfaction of her glance. She did not want to know the expression that lay in his eyes. The possible expressions could be pitiful, disappointed, regretful, angry, compassionate or even caring but there was no point of looking at him because the possible expressions would induce the same reaction from her. This was to burst into a fit of tears- a reaction she had allowed him to see in those passed months. Not this time.
“You-…� Logan started his sentence with a whisper.
“No. Don’t…Don’t speak� she replied quietly but sternly. In this moment, she wanted to see anyone but him. Jean would have been perfect, she was the last person she saw before and her presence would have been a lot more reassuring than the apologetic and apprehensive faces of a doctor and two nurses upon her waking up.
Logan took two steps closer to the bed and clenched his fists. He glared at her and leant a little bit forward as if wanting to smell her yet like her he didn’t want to know what she was feeling. He didn’t want to smell fear, pain, anger, sorrow or regret. But what he absolutely did not want to smell was relief.
“You...You. Told. Her. Not to call me� he growled between gritted teeth. Ororo continued to stare down, refusing to look up.
“Well…She obviously refused to comply …you’re here now aren’t you� she whispered. Logan’s face turned. He wanted to shout and roar and rip the whole room in to shreds.
“He wa- He’s my kid too, ‘Ro! Don’t you thin-…�
“No! Finish what you were going to say first, Logan!� Ororo cried but this time she looked up when she said it. “He was! He…was, because I really doubt that he 'is' anymore!� she continued for him. “An- and you know what, Logan. You can just leave now, you can go! Go back to Canada- look for your past or something because you’re free now…absolutely liberated because you don’t have that responsibility anymore�. She had held back enough tears in her eyes to obscure her vision and stop her from seeing the expression in his eyes.
“What!...do ya hear yourself, ‘Ro…Do ya frikkin’ hear yourself!�- he clenched his fists even tighter. He felt as if his pulse rate was elevating and his pores were opening for beads of fuming sweat. He didn’t even swear anymore…because of her and this is what she was saying to him?
“So that’s it, then? If he…if worse comes worst… ya want me ta…leave? Ya want me out of your life?� the tone in his voice had calmed down but his breathing had not.
“No…I want you to go…now� she returned to whispering and peering south.
“Well good luck in tryna get me to leave, ‘Ro…� Logan said between his once again gritted teeth, he paced the room before coming back to his original position, a foot away from Ororo’s bed.
“I put up with ya coldness, the screaming, I let ya call me every frikkin name under the sun but I still held ya when ya cried� he came closer to the bed
“Stop it� she pleaded with an almost silent voice,
“I bathed ya, washed ya hair, bought ya maternity clothes, carried ya ta bed…and I haven’t even mentioned what I’ve done for him! But ya know what ‘Ro, I didn’t care because I loved ya!� he sighed. “I love you but the least ya could do fer me is talk to me�
“I’m done talking…I’m- I’m�
“Ororo!� Kitty exclaimed bursting into the hospital room almost running and embracing the weather witch who was sat upright in her bed. Jean followed after her, then Scott, Marie and finally Henry- who had all pushed past Logan to see Ororo’s condition.
“Miss! Miss! Excuse me, young lady but no visitors are allowed…� the nursed yelled after Kitty but her voice trailed off after she noticed Logan standing there in an almost combat like stance
“How did you get in here undetected� she muttered before turning her attention to the group who had just joined Ororo and Logan. “Look, I understand that you people have been waiting to see your friend and her b-…right now is not a good time, as you can see, Miss Monroe is exhausted and I’m pretty sure that sh-“
“Thank you very much� Ororo interrupted her , “Thank you very much but I am fine…I-I need them here right now, thank you� she continued while trying to force a soft smile and ignore Kitty’s tight grip around her.
“I understand Miss Munroe but wouldn’t you rather speak to them later and see James?� the nurse replied almost trying to attack Ororo for not taking her suggestion. She did all this while tucking her blonde tendrils of hair behind her ears and widening her already big brown eyes.
Ororo blinked twice before shooting an infuriated look to Logan, she looked back at the nurse and forced that same soft smile again but it turned out to be a weak curving of her mouth. Her throat went dry. “No. Thank you, I need to see my friends now�
The nurse clicked her pen and wrote something on the paper in the clipboard that she was holding. “Very well…� she began to walk out of the room but not without looking at Logan once more “I suppose it is always useful to have your 'friends' around, 'Miss' Monroe� she then left.
“Ororo� Jean began, “Maybe she’s right maybe you do need to see-…�
“How long have you guys been here� Ororo asked slowly breaking out of Kitty’s weakened embrace. Kitty spoke again this time and softly said “Right after Jean called us…we weren’t allowed to see you- nobody let us…we were afraid that…�
“That we’d lost you, ‘Ro� Scott interjected stepping forward and looking at Ororo with relief. Henry had the same expression but this expression did not last long. “I spoke to some of the doctors, my dear�
“Hank please…Did you guys sleep here?� Ororo changed the subject again
“Pretty much� Jean said touching Ororo’s shoulder with a weak smile
“Marie…you’ve been really quiet� Ororo’s attention was now turned to Marie who was almost shuddering and fidgeting to the sound of the medical apparatus at her side.“Ah-ah’m sorry Miss M-Ororo, ah don’t feel comfortable in hospitals- b-but ah was really worried…ah could hardly sleep… Logan didn’t…sleep that it…he was on his feet the whole time he did so much…� Marie’s voice trailed off when she noticed the loss of emotion in Ororo’s face.
“Yes…I’m sure he did�

After hearing one of his nurses complain miserably failing to get rid of a whole group of…them…Dr Clark took his chances, but not at the same angle that his nurse had tried and not for the same motive. Dr Clark was…well…understanding.
“Miss Munroe…� the doctor walked in to the room, catching the attention of all those present in the room, male and female, but not all for the same reason.
Ororo looked up at him but she forced a fake smile like before.
He smiled weakly but it was still stronger than Ororo’s. “Miss Monroe…Mr Howlett…I’m Doctor Clark…we didn’t get to meet before as you were… well…yes…James�
Ororo shuddered at the sound of his name.
“Some of our nurses and staff are finding it rather difficult to disp- t-to deal with you child as he is... your-kind of…people�
“What!� Ororo, Logan and Jean said in unison.
“Excuse me! ‘Her’ kind of people? � Kitty enquired enraged. “We live in 21st century New York!�
“What? No, no, I meant ‘his’ kind of people too� Doctor Clark replied while gesturing to Logan, he tried to reason with them and sighed inwardly.
“Canadians?� Rogue asked with one raised eyebrow. The doctor then exhaled,
“I guess all of you belong to that kind of people� he muttered while looking at a blue-furred Henry and Scott with his visor. “Miss Monroe�, his attention went to her, as she looked like the only level-headed one there. “…We did not have- we…do…not have the knowledge or apparatus to deal with…to equip…mutants…because that is what you are…right?� he came closer to her looking earnestly at her with hazel eyes .Jean interjected.
“We are not aliens; you know…Doctor Clark is it? We share the same DNA as you� her matter-of-factly voice had not been heard in a while. “Besides, I wouldn’t risk moving…that ch-…James to another hospital? Would you?�
Doctor Clark turned his attention once again to Ororo’s side. “Well, that’s assuring, isn’t it, Miss Monroe. You see I did not know that about mutants…I hope I have not caused you any worries…I will get straight back now, Miss Monroe� he said smiling nervously but not taken his eyes off Ororo. Logan growled.
“Thank you, Doctor� she curved her mouth in to a small but sure smile but this time, another nurse walked in to the room. This one was chestnut haired and flustered.
“Excuse me…friends of Miss Monroe and Mr Howlett…I think that you need to leave now…please just let the couple be� she meant in the most sincere kindest way although it was urgent but Jean did not get this communication.
“Look…nurse…I need to be here…for my friends�
“I understand…but please…you can come back and speak later…you do not have to go home…you are perfectly allowed to wait in the…’waiting’…room�
“Look, I’m a doctor and-�
“Jean� Scott warned “Let’s go guys, she’s right…we’ll wait outside�. They all left the room but not without hugging and comforting an emotionless Ororo. Doctor Clark led them all out but left with them
“We’ll be just outside, Ororo�
“We will be always here for you, my dear�
When they had all left, Ororo emotionless face left and she began to glare at Logan who was now emerging due to the leaving crowd of – friends.
“Who are you?!� she spat. Logan turned to her but did not meet her with a compassionate face. ‘It’s my kid too!’ he roared in his mind.
“Oh! So now ya wanna talk?� he challenged, but she looked away but still breathing furiously
“How dare you, Logan� she seethed, “Did I tell you I wanted to name my chil- the baby!�
“The baby?� he questioned. “His name is James. We agreed on it�
“Yeah? ‘Agreed’. Past tense…how can you give him a name now…Oh! So that they have something to write on the g-�
“Stop, Ro!� he ran his hand through his ebony wires of hair. If it wasn’t for his healing factor he was sure that he was going to lose hair due to the amount of times she had made him do this in the past year.
“I saw him, you know� he came dangerously close to her face, and whispered that last line in her ear.
“Be quiet� she threatened.
“Don’t ya wanna what he looked- he looks like, ‘Ro� he almost begged, his voice rasped and then stooped by the side of her bed and held on to her shoulders in order to make vain attempts to oblige her look in to his eyes. She was trying to pull away from him, weakly pushing his chest as if repelled by him.
“No, no, no I don’t want to know� she wept still continuing her fight against him, “No, Logan! I don’t want to know�
“He’s-he- is just amazing, ‘Ro…small but-�
“No! I don’t care I don’t want to know!� her voice raised but only slightly, as her energy know was being spent on her weeps. She struggled against his strength but still refused to cease her hitting of his chest.
“And his hair it’s like your-�
“Shut up please� she pleaded but this time she gave up and looked in to his eyes. She stopped everything, the hitting, the pushing the cries, everything. As if seeing him for the time moved her head slightly away from him and when the last tears from her eyes had completely expelled themselves, her vision became clear. All those expressions that she did not want to see in his eyes were there. Altogether save anger but with the addition of sorrow, like an assembly of them, right there sitting in his iris. She collapsed into his arms and tore up
“I’m sorry…I’m so sorry- I-I thought it was just…� Ororo couldn’t even continue it was like everything was falling around her.
“’Ro, please…please it ain’t ya fault� he kissed her head, gently hushing her and stroking her ivory locks that had now turned into ringlets due to the moisture incurred during the whole process.
“Oh no!� she broke down again. ‘Crap’. Logan thought, he had used the f-word.
“No…no…’Ro please, it really wasn’t it really wasn-‘�
“Just stop it! Stop lying, stop pretending, I-I can’t even believe to explain- And stop that now! Stop petting my hair and telling me that it wasn’t…� she yanked herself away from him and tried once again to get up but to no avail. Logan wouldn’t allow he grabbed her wrists and pulled her closer
“You know that…that it is my fault...� Ororo began to speak in whispers to stop herself from screaming. “I went shopping…shopping Logan! And…and I was like 7 months gone…I…you knew that I shouldn’t have gone in my condition…just be truthful, Logan�
He didn’t say anything, only pulled her straight back into arms and sat on the chair at the side of the bed. None of the others even dared to sit down on that chair while they were here.
“Now� he began “It was nobody’s fault, ‘Ro…and ya know what, we’re not even sure if he’s really de-…if he’s really go-“
The door creaked open and the amiable doctor form appeared at the entrance. His face became blank when his eyes found Ororo’s already down casted appearance. “Miss Munroe…please…I…we� he couldn’t. He had been doing this same job for the past fifteen years of his life yet those words refused to come out.
“Just say it� Logan growled lowly but menacingly.
“I’m…I’m very sorry Miss Monroe…Mr Howlett…we did the best we could� Doctor Clark then came towards the bed and knelt down, so he could speak to a slumped Ororo. He looked at her frame that automatically appeared smaller as she was cowering in to Logan’s chest. He could only see her body tremble due to her inaudible breathless sobs. Usually breaking the news was…not easy for him…but more bearable. However, to this woman…Doctor Clark sighed.
“Miss Monroe� he touched her shoulder
“Don’t touch her� Logan growled all the same but his expression did not match his voice. His eyes were shining with moisture and his lips were…pretty close to trembling.
“Mr Howlett…, please�, Logan slowly released Ororo out of his faint grasp but her weak groan almost made him grab her back.
“Miss Monroe…� she faced him now, her face, heartbroken. “Miss Monroe, I understand what you must feeling right now although you may not believe it…the least we at this hospital could do…is offer you the support needed to somehow…overcome this…�
Ororo only nodded whilst tears slid down her cheeks, she slowly looked up at Logan who was now standing up…hand on his face breathing heavily. She looked back down at Doctor Clark with her devastated face and could only say “…thank…you�.
The doctor found her hand and squeezed it, he stood up and went to do the door resting on the side and sighing. “Tabby…um Tabitha…Nurse Evans…you can come in now�
The brunette nurse now appeared at the door and gradually stepped in to the middle of the room, she was holding something but not her clipboard. In her arms was cradled, a bundle of light blue cloth. It wasn’t empty.
Ororo gasped and began to shake in horror, Logan immediately removed his hand from his face and looked down at Ororo, and he could feel the sobs coming and felt despondent because he knew that she would cry for him.
“Miss Monroe…do you want to hold him?� Nurse Evans almost held him out to her. Ororo now, yes, she began to shudder and cry. She had to look up again at Logan due to desperation but shook her head violently.
“’Ro…it’s your call…� Logan croaked while a shapeless tear slid down his face. Ororo nodded at him and whispered “yes…but Logan…please I need to be alone…� he understood and did not argue.
Nurse Evans slowly came towards Ororo as Logan began, at an even slower pace, walked away.
“I’m sorry� the nurse mumbled as she carefully and unhurriedly place the baby…James…in to Ororo’s arms and she tutted apologetically and pitiful.
Ororo inhaled and did not breathe back out, she plucked up the courage to look down, fighting back the tears and look at her child for the first time through slit ‘white’ eyes.
He lay there with a blend of mocha but rosy skin, his eyes were shut, and that made Ororo regret…I will never see those eyes- she thought. His scalp was decorated with silver strands of hair and he was so small…so tiny in her arms. The tears defeated her. She cried for every mother that had lost a child…and every father, and even for the children that were never given that chance to live. ‘I wanted to get rid of you before’ Ororo lamented in her mind, ‘Will you ever forgive me?’ she vainly asked him mentally.
She then spoke openly “I’m sorry…James� as if waiting for an answer. She did not get one. It was obvious she thought

But then…he gurgled.

Logan stopped one inch from the door. James gurgled. He made a sound and Logan heard it as clear as day.
That one miniscule sound echoed in his ear and in an instant Logan whipped his head around to see the image of the mother of his child whimpering and shaking with utter ‘shock’. “‘Ro…?�, when Logan had got her attention, she looked straight at him with blank irises. Her eyes were white

“Logan…Logan� she breathed trying to fathom and process in her already disorientated mind, why her once lifeless baby was now squirming in her arms and giving off heat. He did not make another sound…But suddenly he spluttered and a burst of continual infantile wails spurted out of his little mouth.

“Um…Stan?!� Nurse Evans’ voice elevated as she turned to the Doctor Clark and put both hands on the sides of her face. “I checked! I swear, he was gone, he stopped breathing at- he-he was gone...� The thoughts were running through her mind. If Ororo had said that she did not want to hold him, this nurse would be walking back with that premature baby that maybe would ‘wake up’ in her arms…which would cause her to drop him in shock.
James would not stop crying

“Miss Munroe- we are going to need to take that child back, to run some tests- this is not natural and I am sure even for mutants…� he stopped talking as he paced rapidly towards Ororo’s bed and vainly stretched out his hands to take the child that was now shrieking in Ororo’s arms. She clutched him tighter.
“No- No! You will fail again, I-I can’t take that risk-no-no please leave him with me� Ororo’s breathing was frantic but she would not let go of her son.
“No, please, Miss Monroe, give me James� the nurse tried to create a wedge with her hands between Ororo and her little James who’s cries were close to impairing any form of communication.
She needed to ensure that this baby lived. She could not, no; she would not allow herself to get in to that type of trouble- to have a mutant baby die under her surveillance. “Miss Monroe! Please, we cannot risk losing James again… We need to have-�She moved in front of Ororo in order to try and reason with her.
She frantically but carefully removed her hands from where they were before and light grabbed Ororo’s shoulders, she looked in to her eyes…�OH CRAP!� Nurse Evans squealed and jumped away which caused her to lose her balance and fall south.

-
Tabitha Evans had not seen a lot of peculiar things in her few years working as a nurse in this hospital at this side of New York. However her experience at nursing school had prepared her for most of them, some of which being too tragic so she decided to focus on the midwifery side of things. Because, really, what could be more joyous than watching families welcome a new baby in to their lives? The thought was beautiful. However, she began to see the sad side of a baby being born. Soon she became used to words such as, ‘miscarriage’, ‘abortion’, ‘still birth’, ‘disfigurement’, ‘neglect’ , ‘maternal death’ and a lot more other words to add to her vocabulary that would make her job nothing more than it was, a job. She thought that she was going to love it, when she was given a post at this hospital, how wrong she was.

But now, all she could do was laugh within herself, because of the sudden twist of events. Just within the last two days, she was nursing a bed-ridden woman and helping her deliver her baby but now she was the one, trapped in a bed with a continuous beeping sound that reminded her that she was alive.
“Tabby…water?� Doctor Clark offered her a cup of water that she slowly took.
“Thanks, Stan� Tabitha sat up, sipped and let the cool liquid run down her throat. She then sighed, “…I…I don’t know, maybe I’m not cut out for this job after all�
Doctor Clark only chuckled at sat on the seat at the side of the bed. “…You carried a supposedly dead baby that turned out to be alive and then you saw the mother’s eyes go clear white…�
He then leaned forward. “Your reaction was average if anything…That was quite a fall you took though, Tabby�

Tabitha felt the gash on her head that came with a complementary bump and bandage. She rolled her eyes and muttered something about how being a firewoman would be a lot safer.
“Look…It shocked me, yeah, but it didn’t shock me as much because I’ve been a doctor for a very long time…You’ll get used to it, Tabby�

He was right, he had seen people come out of comas after many years, he had seen Christians come and pray, maybe sing which restored life apparently because people he had then pronounced dead were singing hymns in the next hour. He had even had his fair share of sudden deaths. What had just happened with that Miss Monroe and her child only shocked him and fascinated him because they were mutants. People he had never met before, to the best of his knowledge.

Doctor Clark smiled at Tabitha but this time got up, “Just rest, I’ll get back to the whole…mutant thing, and I’ll check on you later�
Tabitha nodded and sunk back in to the bed.

-
Logan paced slowly up and down the room with his arms folded in to his chest. The sound of his heavy footsteps filled the room almost overpowering the monotonous beeps of the machines.
He sighed but almost silently and released his arms from the fold that he had made with them.
He finally made his way to Ororo’s bed and then bent down to pick up the discarded pamphlets that had fell off Ororo’s lap during the “awakening� of their son. While in the position he read the title of one of the pamphlets in his head.
‘Mourning a miscarriage- the support and guide…� Logan’s thoughts trailed off when another leaflet caught his eye. It had been pushed under the bed during the ‘shock’ and folded in a rare way. Logan could only make you the words “stillbirth�; he then fully crouched down and reached out to get this one and another two that had found their way to the ground. He folded each of them individually and slid them in to his pocket. Discretion was never one of his strengths but he did this as subtly as possible so that Ororo could not see his ‘just in case’ actions.

Ororo had been silent for the last hour…or maybe it only seemed like hours to Logan as in this time he had been left with his thoughts. He looked at her stare in to as he gradually came up from his stooping position. He peered down at her as if for the first time seeing how low down she was from him. In times like this, Logan longed for Xavier’s telepathic skills …because it seemed that only the strongest of telepaths could decode Ororo’s mind. Then again, Logan missed Xavier. It was as simple as that. He would have known what to say to Ororo to melt her icy exterior and make her see reasonably. Charles would offered…no… he would have given Logan all the advice that an expecting father would need whether Logan wanted it or not and after receiving one of Logan’s sardonic or flippant comments, he would have chuckled and continued with what he was doing as he knew that Logan had absorbed every word of his advice. Logan…missed…Charles Xavier.
But then Logan realised the main problem. It would take another man to decrypt the mother of his child. Because that was what Ororo was, the mother of his child and he was the father of hers. His eyebrows furrowed while his eyes remained on Ororo’s head. He knew that she did not see it that way.

“I’m not losing him again, Logan� Ororo whispered, finally breaking the verbal silence and peering up and eventually staring in to Logan’s eyes. Her statement sounded more like a plea than an affirmation.
“I can’t� she ran her hands through her ivory locks and then put her on her face.
“Not many women get...� her eyes began to well up and she removed her hands from her face, “…get that chance�
“What will I do if I lose him, Logan?� she sniffed and wiped the tear from her eye.
“I will not bear it…I can’t…it’s too hard for me…my only son…my only child�, she began to imagine scenes of the aftermath of all this. Going back to the mansion, clearing away all the things that she had gotten for him, mourning in her bed and rejecting all forms of comfort.
“Logan, what will I-“
“OK, Ro!� he finally snapped. Ororo moved back in her bed frowning and showing her confusion at his reaction.
“Yeah…You…You all the fu-…all the time…I could possibly lose my baby too, Ro�
“What? Logan I know-�
“No, ya don’t know! ‘Cos you seem to think that you were the only one in this whole process- He’s my kid too�
“But we’ve just been through this…I know� she whispered this time, trying to find a hint of compassion in his eyes, but there was none. “Logan…�
“No, ‘Ro�, he crouched near the bed coming very close to her face. “What were you gonna do, ‘Ro?�
“W-what?�
“Tell me…� he leaned closer “…what were you gonna do?�
“If he didn’t…?�
“If he didn’t wake up, you know what I am asking you� his stare had become more intense and Ororo backed even further away.
“I-I…don’t know� she said clearing her throat quietly and plucking up the courage to look in to his eyes. “I don’t know... you can’t…what kinds of a question is that?�
“Don’t lie…what were you gonna do?�
“I wasn’t going to do anything� she lied uncomfortably and Logan detected it. The image was very clear. She was going to leave. She was going to go back to the mansion, mourn, pack her bags and silently leave.
“Where were ya gonna go? Scotland? Africa? Tell me� he grabbed her by her shoulders and she immediately pulled away from him. He could see the anger building up inside her as her temperature rose and she shuddered furiously.
“You don’t get to touch me like that, Logan. Are you insane?�
Logan eyes were now shining with unshed tears of rage…rage nothing more.
“’Ro…I can only tell ya that…You’re a selfish, vindictive b-�
“Oh…I see you have learnt new vocabulary…now learn to leave me alone� she almost spat it at him.
“Ya know what, ‘Ro! I’ve done my…�
Logan stopped speaking as the door was slowly pushed open and their doctor came in to the room.
Doctor Clark saw the almost combat like position that Logan had taken and Ororo vulnerable form in the bed.
“Miss Monroe?...�
Ororo sighed and nodded as if telling him that she was alright, another lie that she had managed to squeeze in without speaking.
Doctor Clark came towards the nervous mother in the hospital bed and gently touched her shoulder.

“Your baby…would you like to see him now?�

After having stood in the sterile white room for over 5 minutes, Ororo finally ‘spoke’ to her son first child,
“Oh James� she breathed while peering close trying not to affect the incubator that nested and supported her firstborn. She stared at his features again, only blinking after long intervals and rimming her fingers along the apparatus. His once mocha skin was now mottled with rose undertones and the strands of hair that appeared silver had now darkened , thickened and appeared more…wiry? She longed to see his eyes but she did not lament as she knew that it was possible now, not like before when his eyes appeared firmly and permanently shut…
No, she decided that she was not going to think about that anymore, there was no need, her baby was fine- well…better than before. He had been born about two months before his due date and so was clinically premature she reminded herself. She promised herself that she would be the best mother that this child could have- but no longer were her thoughts internal- she began.
“How will I explain this day to you…seeing that you will stay with me long enough� she whispered but there was a tone of humour under her voice. The weather witch smiled a watery smile as one tear slid down her cheek- the tear didn’t take residence on her face for long; she wiped it, almost as quick as it came.
“No, my son, I will no longer cry…there is no longer a reason to cry, is there? You are here, James. You stayed� she whispered again in awe, “…and I am ever grateful, my child�. She did not want to touch him but she walked around the other side of the incubator, with her face still bearing a small genuine smile, and resumed her position of hovering over it and leaning in to peer at James.
“I promise you that I will be the best mother that you could ever have� she told him this time, “…yes, I will scold you ...and… and reprimand you when the moment calls for something as such� she silently chuckled, “…but you will always know that I love you, that ‘we’ love you…oh James I love you so much�
This time Ororo allowed a stream of tears to come because they had come due to her happiness and not sorrow. She ran one hand through her hair, the action done out of relief. “…your father loves you…so much�. Ororo moved back this time and pondered her last revelation to her son. It was as if the realization had hit her and she put her hand to her chest. Logan DID love their son, he had already done so much, he was the one that urged Ororo to keep him...She let the guilt wash over her but returned back to her ponderings.
Logan loved their son and her. He looked after her when she was carrying little James in so many ways. Logan was right; her had bathed her and given her so many things when she was nesting their baby. A knowing smile crept on to Ororo’s face when she remembered the deeds that Logan had done in the prior months. Yes, he had done a lot, like massaging her feet…even if it was by force. She remembered how she came and slumped on her queen sized bed in her attic room and complained about how much she believed that her feet had swollen up. He was there for here, suddenly grabbling and tickling her feet until she gave up and allowed him to massage them with a smile on both their faces.
Her current smile slowly faded, she had pushed him away so much that now he responded with anger. When her doctor had asked them to come and see their child they were already midway in to a huge argument. Her doctor had to assist her off the bed as Logan had already walked out of the room. Her resentment for him then had caused her to tell him that she wanted time alone with her son firmly; he did not argue, only lifted up his arms in defeat and let her proceed. But she felt his glare. However, when she was looking at her son that she conceived with Logan, she could not feel anything other less than love, respect and affection for him. This moment was to be shared with James’ father. Ororo quickly gathered herself and whispered soothing and affectionate words to her son. She would now accept Logan’s love and give him back nothing less than that.
Logan stalked towards the waiting area in search for his team mates that had offered their support. He was truly grateful for their presence…even though he did not know it before. He intended on putting them out of their misery, he didn’t know how long it had been, but he knew that the others were none the wiser concerning James’ death and…resurrection? Rebirth? Awakening? Logan did not know what to call it.
He was more than happy that he had his son but unfortunately his face did not show this. His jaws were tight and his eyes sullen, his eyebrows were slightly creased together in a subconscious frown. ‘This should be the happiest moment of my life’ he scowled inwardly, “…it’s just her� he seethed this time externally. For these past months, he had done a lot for Ororo and he had intended to do a lot more for her also. Intended to. He would know give all his affection to his little James. He loved him. Yes, he would ‘set him straight’ if he ever crossed that line but yes, he loved him and always will. James’ mother on the other hand…
“Logan!� he heard a woman call out his name but due to the familiarity of her scent and tone of voice, he knew who she was
“Hey Red…where’re the rest of them?� he inquired realising that she was alone. Jean smiled a small smile, it was the first time in a very long time that Logan had called her a pet name of any sort. Logan had realised it too. He was grateful for Jean’s presence. She had played the supportive friend role in the past months leading up to James’ arrival and he had really appreciated it. Her clinginess and almost wanton behaviour with him prior to those months had turned him off considerably but now…she no longer showed these desperate traits. He studied her, she had removed her jackets and was now wearing a red shirt…that fit and revealed the right places and black jeans that reminded Logan for some reason how long her legs were. Her lips were now rubies to him and her green eyes, emeralds. Somehow, her red hair seemed more vibrant on her milky skin…
“I sent them home…I was on my way to get some coffee� she whispered answering him whilst staring in to his steel grey eyes and meeting his gaze that had just finish making a trip from her body, she cleared her throat and continued, “Rogue was saying something about how hospitals are not the best place for her, Kitty was struggling to stay awake…�
“…and Scooter?� Logan asked while coming closer to her and lowering his head.
“Scott…well I made him take the girls home. I assured them it would be fine…that James would be fine…I did not intend on lying, Logan…� she put a hand on his shoulder and replaced her small smile with a mask of concern. “…is he fine?�
Logan was close enough to Jean that now her perfume was all that invaded his nostrils; he took her hand from his shoulder and squeezed it.
“He’s…he’s good, Jeannie�
Jeannie? Jean only smiled again.
“I’m happy for you, Logan. I know that you are a lot of things…� she chuckled, “...but a good father happens to be one of them…I just know it� she said the last line in a whisper. Yes, Ororo was the lucky one she pondered as she examined Logan’s rugged masculine features. She looked up at his hair, those wiry ebony locks had been in her hand before, and those eyes had once only been for her also. Those lips…she had felt them against her own countless times. She only smiled with her eyes when she realised just how ‘lucky’ Ororo really was. Logan was roaming his eyes over her too. Their eyes stayed glued to one another and it had managed to bring back memories, memories that Logan had thought had died along time ago…and memories Jean thought that were just that, they both leaned in closer but just as quickly as they leaned in Jean jumped back when she saw a flash of ivory and sienna.
Ororo was stood about a meter away from the tableau that consisted of the father of her baby and her...best friend. She only managed these words.
“James…you…you can see him now�

“He’s so precious�
“He’s the most beautiful thang ah’ve ever seen�
“Awww�

Ororo was sat down comfortably on the armchair directly opposite her bed wearing a baby sling across her body that connected herself to her firstborn, James. She could hear the comments of awe and wonder and she was thanking them with a serene and grateful smile but her expression and exterior did not mirror what she was feeling on the inside. It had been two whole weeks and a few days since baby James had been born and reborn and the first night they had slept inside the mansion. Having just arrived yesterday, Ororo was still readjusting to just being back inside the mansion and not having the constant sound of beeping and humming around her. She wondered how it must have felt for her new-born son.

“When can we hold him?� Jubilee asked excitedly as she moved closer towards Ororo and her son. Ororo looked up at Jubilee, Rogue and Kitty with a slightly amused expression. The three younger mutants had formed an arch around her preventing any form of freedom. She raised an eyebrow and smiled softly
“Well…James needs to sleep…then eat…then sleep again. You can hold him when he’s not so busy� she said with humour in her eyes. The three students rolled their eyes.
“Come on, Ororo…please� Kitty pleaded whilst bending over to see the slumbering baby against Ororo’s chest.
“You three have a class…that starts…now?�
The girls groaned.
“After…I promise� and with that the three mutants left Ororo’s attic bedroom gleefully.
Now alone, Ororo began to ponder.
It was strange.
For a brief period she had lost him.
James was dead for those 5 minutes and she felt as if her heart and her stomach had been brutally ripped from her body.
She remembered.
She refused to scream or wail because he had already gone
That wouldn’t bring him back, she would just let her blood run cold and wait for the pain to pass. She remained calm because she had already half accepted his death before it was announced.
Then just like that…
“Can I see him?�
Ororo thoughts were taken to a halt by the sound of a familiar voice.

“No…Um…Not right now-uh- he’s resting.� She cleared her throat. “He’s been through a lot…and all the different voices and faces he has to see… I do not want his sleep to be disturbed before we have to go back to the hospital…� Her voice trailed off as she lost the will to make excuses.
“Oh� Jean also cleared her throat and forced a smile. “That’s ok�, she ran her hand through her russet locks before continuing “You’re right…He needs his rest�
“Yeah�
“Yeah…and you know, I could always see him again when you guys get back�
“That’s true�
There was a deafening silence for three seconds before Jean took it upon herself to break it.
“Um…when will you guys be back?� She asked, making sure to keep her falsely placid smile on her face.
“Well…Piotr has agreed to drop me there…I’ll see how long it takes-�
“What? Logan isn’t taking you?� Jean eyes widened a little and she took a step closer to the resident weather witch. Ororo looked up then.
“No�
Ororo gently held her sleeping son closer to her as she slowly got up from her seat.
“I told him not to� She lied. Logan did not even know that she was going. “I will tell him everything he needs to know when I get back� She paused. “I need to spend some time with…James alone, you know, to bond with him as his mother. As James’ father Logan should understand that�
Jean nodded and glanced at the resting baby.
“Well, Jean…I think I will start going now, we will speak later…perhaps�

Ororo walked past her team mate and left the room. She had no words for her. What she had seen in the hospital was enough and she did not feel the need to carry on the ‘best friend’ charade. They had not exchanged more than a sentence or two since that day and Ororo had decided that it was probably better that way. And as for Logan…

Logan was a good father, she knew it by the way he picked James up so delicately with his burly hands and how he held him so carefully with his muscular arms. She knew it every time she saw the unfallen tears of joy in his eyes as he looked at his son. The way everything that he said revolved around him… No...That was simply because they had nothing more to speak about. He loved his son dearly but did he love her? Ororo wasn’t so sure.

She had neither the time nor energy to spend on crying about Logan’s detachment although it did occupy her mind as she rocked herself to sleep softly caressing her sons head at night. She hardly ever allowed James to sleep in a crib, Ororo smiled faintly as she remembered how she had managed to convince her friends that it was simply a Kenyan tradition. The truth was she was scared. She shivered every time he was taken away from her or if Logan lifted him too high and every time she laid him to rest her throat closed up. So, she decided that every chance that she got, she would hold him.

Ororo Munroe was simply too busy to worry about Logan’s affections, she’d convinced herself.
----------------
It was ten o clock in the morning and Scott was only just having his breakfast. He had already cancelled four morning classes in the space of two weeks and refused to do it again, luckily, his doting girlfriend had offered to take his nine o clock class as he rested. Scott thanked Jean inwardly as he took another sip of his juice.
About thirty exam papers were piled up, alongside his orange juice and bagel waiting for him to grade them. He groaned then lifted up the red pen on top of them and opened the first paper whilst shaking his head with a smirk. It was funny, life was more…normal. He was now a teacher that graded papers and actually sat down whilst having breakfast. He had a girlfriend who covered for him and one of his best friends was now a mother. Scott could not remember the last time that he had used his powers. Since Charles’ departure, missions were almost non-existent. There was the occasional recruit but that was not down to them. It was due to the fact that Xavier’s School for Gifted Youngsters was a household name for mutants in the streets. It was slowly becoming a safe haven for mutants, a place where they could run to when they needed to. And they did, the past four months had seen three new students, two girls and a boy. He feared that the School was operating like a glorified hostel. He didn’t understand how Charles could do it, how he could keep that balance between safe haven and educational institution. But that was one of the many things Scott admired about Xavier, he did find that balance.

He missed him. His advice. His comfort. His care. His love, Charles was the closest thing to a father that Scott had since the death of his parents. It was Charles he would run to if he needed any of those things. They never called each other father and son but they never needed to. That mutual respect and bond was present to anyone. Scott smirked again as he remembered storming in to the Charles’ office, his face as red as his visor. He had seen Jean with Logan once again, they were not touching nor kissing but they were just too close for comfort. Charles already knew he was coming and moved closer to the door so that when Scott did enter he would be right there waiting for him. Scott smiled now. He wished that Charles could see that he and Jean had gathered up the remnants of their relationships and had managed to fix them. He wished that Charles could see that Logan finally respected that relationship and that he was preoccupied with his own. That his feelings for Ororo had become platonic enough once again. Scott had nothing more to worry about, not anymore, according to him.


-------------------
“Good morning, Miss Monroe. How are we today?�

Ororo smiled weakly at the owner of the familiar voice.
“Hello, Dr Clark, I am…well and James is…as good as can be� she said pleasantly as she slowly and carefully took a seat in front of the doctor. He smiled back, but he already knew that something was wrong. He had never had a new mother return back to the hospital on her own accord so quickly after being discharged.

“I did not think that you would be back so soon…�
“Yes…I know, thank you for finding time for me on such short notice� she responded with uttermost gratefulness on her face. She had called the hospital the night before, requesting to speak with Dr Clark.
“It was no problem, I am going in to theatre soon so I was going to be here early anyway…So Miss Munroe, what seems to be the problem?�
Ororo stared at the doctor without saying a word. She could feel James breathing and found comfort in the rhythm.
“I…�
Stanley Clark sighed inwardly and then forced a sympathetic smile. He knew that she was not going to talk so easily but he refused to get frustrated as he had dealt with such situations before. It was guilt that was stopping her from talking, he had encountered so many woman who hesitated to speak about their offspring’s problems because they felt as if it was their fault. He tried another approach.
“I have never dealt with a…�
“Mutant?� Ororo asked, suddenly snapped out of her mantra.
“Yes, a mutant baby. I am so sorry if I have not been able to assist you adequately in the space of these two weeks.
Ororo frowned slightly, almost confused.
“Would you mind telling me about your…mutation?� he asked whilst leaning forward across his desk.
“I do not understand what this has to do with my baby� she responded almost defensively whilst shades of red began to form on her face.
“I am very sorry if I have made you feel uncomfortable, Miss Munroe�. His apology was earnest, Stanley Clark had never encountered a mutant in his life…not knowingly…but he had met the victims of them.
Ororo nodded in acceptance and looked down at her son.
“Your apology is accepted� she whispered “and please…call me Ororo…I feel as if I am talking to one of my students�
He grinned and Ororo allowed a glimmer of humour to show in her eyes.
“Ororo… that is a very interesting name. Its Swahilli right?�
She smiled softly and nodded.
“How did you know that? It’s not a very common name�
“I can speak a little Swahilli�
Stanley chuckled at the surprise that was now visible on Ororo’s face and ran his hand through his dark hair. He stood up and walked towards his cabinet slowly reaching over to get a framed photo.
“Well there is one phrase that I can say perfectly… Una-zung-umza kiingereza?�
Ororo laughed, almost surprised at the sound that had escaped her, she had not heard it in a long time.

“Do you speak English?� She raised her eyebrow amused, “I’m guessing that it’s the only phrase you know?� she added tilting her head to the side.
“Pretty much. I spent two months there- in Kenya, on an internship in my second year of grad school� he told her nonchalantly.
“What? Really?�
“Yes� Dr Clark grinned, humoured by the surprise written all over Ororo’s face.
“They needed assistants that could work with the doctors there. I was just there passing their apparatus to them�
He sat back down again and met Ororo’s gaze.
“Look� he passed the photo to Ororo who took it with awe and wonder as she saw a familiar mountain.
“Mount Kilimanjaro� she whispered whilst looking at a younger version of the Doctor with cargo shorts and a white shirt, posing in front of the mountain.
“But this is in Tanzania, you told me that you went to Kenya� she said still smiling as she remembered the time she spent in both countries she called home.
“I did, but me and a couple of Dutch interns went on an excursion to the Mountain with a Kenyan friend. It was amazing� he sighed reminiscing.
Ororo looked down at James who looked back at her with half opened eyes.
“Look, James� she whispered showing him the picture, “I’m going to take you right here one day� she pointed at the peak of the Mountain and then stroked her sons head softly.
Stanley Clark smiled at the mother and her son.
“Yes, I didn’t always want to be a doctor in a hospital. No, no that wasn’t the plan� he said shaking his head with a half-smile.
“I wanted to travel the world saving lives-�
“But you did� Ororo interrupted him with a soft whisper, looking up from James and straight in to the doctor’s eyes. “You speak as if you were never able to complete those goals…but you did and I’m sure saved so many lives…�
“No…I planned to stay in Africa for at least two years then, when I was good and ready, I’d go to Sri Lanka for a few months...� He paused and his smile turned bittersweet. “I didn’t last 3 months in Africa�, looking down and rubbing his forehead with his thumb and index finger he sighed quietly. “I uh…I saw too many things and I…I just couldn’t handle it�
Ororo smiled at Dr Clark supportively as he looked back up at her
“You know, Africa is such a beautiful continent and I guess when…�
“I understand� Ororo whispered with a sympathetic look. Stanley’s expression suddenly lightened and his charming smile returned to his face.
“I guess you must think that I’m a sell-out working here� he said as Ororo returned the photo to him.
Ororo chuckled quietly “No...Not even slightly… Africa needed you in those 2 months and now America does�

Stanley grinned “Yes…I guess you could say that�. His gaze met Ororo’s again and they both smiled, comfortable with the sudden silence and the mutual eye contact between themselves. Dr Clark was looking at Ms Munroe as if for the first time. Yes, she was beautiful, he already knew that he was neither blind nor oblivious. Usually, being the good doctor that he was, Dr Clark paid no attention to such detail especially when the ‘beautiful woman’ in question is a patient. However, in this case he did, after all they were having an informal conversation and he was simply making an observation. He was simply observing the tousled white waves in her hair contrasting against her warm mocha complexion and cerulean eyes that were curtained by her dark long lashes.